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Mt_Rider

Got some news....with difficulties

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DH's sister called tonite to say their mom is "in hospice".  She's still living with SIL but they have hospice assistance now.  So DH is calling to find plane flights/car rental for this week.  He wants to see her before she passes and then won't go to the funeral cuz it is too much cost and ....

 

.....then there is the issue of leaving me with all the animals and weather.......and my folks ....alone out here.  DH is "last man standing" so to speak, for many things in our lives and my parent's.   My dad is still driving around their village but no further.  I can drive a few miles to our tiny village...if I'm doing ok.  But it would take an EVAC to get me to drive further.  And....it's winter.   We have a gutter drainage pipe that is chock full of ice and backing up everything....sending melting ice down in front of the access door to garage/basement space.  Just figured that out today. 

 

But .....we'll all deal with this.  He MUST go...and go now, quickly.  Likely leave on Tues.  I'll call my church to ask someone to drive him over to the city to airport.  He'll work Sun/Mon and doesn't work again till next week.  And we'll need the money after paying for this trip.  It came up suddenly....cuz his mom acts like nothing is wrong.  She will be THRILLED to see him again so this is absolutely going to happen. 

 

Pray for all of us, please. 

MtRider 

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:hug3: Be careful while he is gone. Praying for safe travels for hubby and peace and quiet, in other words not major happens,  for you and your mom and dad while he is gone.

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18 hours ago, Mt_Rider said:

DH's sister called tonite to say their mom is "in hospice".  She's still living with SIL but they have hospice assistance now.  So DH is calling to find plane flights/car rental for this week.  He wants to see her before she passes and then won't go to the funeral cuz it is too much cost and ....

 

.....then there is the issue of leaving me with all the animals and weather.......and my folks ....alone out here.  DH is "last man standing" so to speak, for many things in our lives and my parent's.   My dad is still driving around their village but no further.  I can drive a few miles to our tiny village...if I'm doing ok.  But it would take an EVAC to get me to drive further.  And....it's winter.   We have a gutter drainage pipe that is chock full of ice and backing up everything....sending melting ice down in front of the access door to garage/basement space.  Just figured that out today. 

 

But .....we'll all deal with this.  He MUST go...and go now, quickly.  Likely leave on Tues.  I'll call my church to ask someone to drive him over to the city to airport.  He'll work Sun/Mon and doesn't work again till next week.  And we'll need the money after paying for this trip.  It came up suddenly....cuz his mom acts like nothing is wrong.  She will be THRILLED to see him again so this is absolutely going to happen. 

 

Pray for all of us, please. 

MtRider 

 

In Jesus' Name...

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Thank you all!!!!!  I just read our weather report for this week.....and it's not good.  :wacko:  MORE snow and we're all ice and snow-pack still from the last one....two.  The melting has been flooding some of our main pathways.  I've been shoveling what dirt/grit I can get loose to cover the ice.  I've resorted to spreading old hay....just to get a better gripping surface!  But if it snows...all that lies underneath.  Just thinking of dealing with snow...on Tuesday when we're planning for him to be flying and renting car...driving 2 hrs to get to SIL's house.  And my shoulders [esp Right] keep going into fiery spams...locking so I can't move it up.  There are things in our lives that requires two hands in air....like shutting window coverings.

 

So your words of encouragement and prayer have me taking a deep breath and calming again.  God is here and beyond reasonable expectation, I will be able to do this.....or HE will send help.  Someone from my church is driving DH down to the airport ...and later pick him up.  That's settled.  My folks had him stop by and gave him money to make sure he has enough.  We do but they want to help.  And who knows....DH might stay a bit longer if she's about to pass....

 

Stay tuned...this was one situation we were not expecting right now.  Pray that my folks stay healthy and stable toooooo!

MtRider  ...thanks so much for your support !

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It sounds like things will work out for DH's trip. Hope you will be able to hold down the fort until he gets back.

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Prayers for your MIL and safe travels for your DH. Not to be insensitive but he might want to take funeral clothes. Speaking from experience here. It happened to me once and I had to make a very fast trip to Wal-Mart. I looked and felt awful.  :blush:  

 

Take it as slow as you can and do only what needs to be done. I was going to suggest staying with your folks but then remembered the animals. So glad your church family is an option.

 

Don't be afraid to call an ambulance if you or your folks get down. Safer than you or your dad trying to drive!

 

Will be holding you up in prayers. :pray:

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"... but he might want to take funeral clothes. "  Yeah, I'm hoping he has room for black pants and a shirt.  But he's not checking any bags, just carry-on and personal bag.  He's a minimalist tho.....unlike me.  That's one of the reasons he would change the departure date...if she's going to pass quickly.  :sigh:   This is happening so fast...it seems.  One is never ready but I think DH is kinda still in shock.  A nearby neice is trying not to go into early labor but she's probably going to give birth in the next few days.  Just more drama... but he'll get to see a new Great niece or nephew.  A passing and a birth at the same time.  Life moving to the next generations.

 

 

I'm so very tired.....but we did get DH tickets on the Bereavement Fare this morning.  Took several calls to get all the data.  Ticketing folks both offered condolences, which is their 'script' for Bereavement Fares but it's nice.  That fare takes some $ off the price but the value is in no penalty for changing the dates.  I've used that several times when I've gone to help ...when DD1 got plowed over on her moped.  And when my brother's fiance died of cancer....he had her daughter to care for along with all the funeral arrangements and his work sites and....appreciated the help.  By now, that 10 yr old girl has been our niece for nearly 20 yrs.  We just kept her even tho my brother didn't get a chance to marry her mom!  :)  

 

So DH has a ride to airport tomorrow.....and despite all the SNOW that's going on, the actual airport area is probably not going to catch much of this.  Might be a bit tricky up on this mountain tho.  The church deacon [mountain rancher] who's driving DH has a 4-wheel drive, of course. 

 

God has been reminding me of all sorts of ways that HE takes care of those in need.  Quite specifically ....so I'll be ok.  For the first time since the last 2 snows....my shoulder isn't 'frozen' and I can reach up without squealing.  :amen: 

 

More snow scheduled for later in week but if DH comes back on Sat...the weekend will be sunny...with melting snow.  B)

 

MtRider  ....I think we've thot of everything.  :shrug: 

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I forgot about the bereavement fare. I used it too when I went to S.C. to help take care of my cousin while she was passing. 

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Just want to check, since you'll be there by yourself - you do have somebody to check in with who is not your hubby or parents, right?  Somebody who, if you don't answer the phone a few times or contact them at a certain time, has the ability to come check on you?

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My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. 💜

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I remember when you posted a pic of you and your cousin, Jeepers.  :(  And yes, I did see to it that he has 'funeral clothes' ...glad that doesn't have to be a suit.  Just nice pants, nice shirt, nice sweater if he needs that.  [ won't tell what HE thot he could wear as shirt....]  Guys! 

 

TheCG.....wellllll, that's a good question.  Due to long-term disability, I have usually had that set up.  But my close friends N/W are so overwhelmed right now.  W came to plow us out of DRIFTS of snow today before the guy came to pick DH up for airport.  I think I only have my folks to call before I go feed and after.  If they didn't hear from me, they could call N/W or they could just ask for a 'wellness check'.  They can't come check themselves.  It's harder to have them as backup....I think I'll have my mom write down the time I go out.  Cuz she got DH's flight departure time mixed up X3  :unsure:  

 

I have no cell service but there are locations thru out the barn yard and even on the road where I walk dog, where the cordless house phone picks up signal.  I call those locations: phone booths.  I just realized that term is not going to be known to youngers....except if they watch OLD Superman movies.  LOL  I also have the car which is more reliable starting in cold weather than my older truck.  Yeah, I think we've got the risks minimized.... 

 

I'll tell you, starting with a BLIZZARD today scared me ...but God and I had a talk and I'm ok again.  :pray:   We're sunny now and driveway plowed.  

 

MtRider  ....but I used up a week's worth of energy already.  :pray: 

 

 

 

 

 

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14 hours ago, Mt_Rider said:

I have no cell service but there are locations thru out the barn yard and even on the road where I walk dog, where the cordless house phone picks up signal.  I call those locations: phone booths.  I just realized that term is not going to be known to youngers....except if they watch OLD Superman movies.  LOL  I also have the car which is more reliable starting in cold weather than my older truck.  Yeah, I think we've got the risks minimized.... 

  

 

Why do you think we don't see Superman anymore?  No phone booths.

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I'll tell the story of my day over in Whatcha doing?  This is DH's story-so-far.... 

 

DH arrived in Mpls airport at midnight.  Went to Salt Lake UT first...  He called as he headed for the rental car.  He had a 50 min drive to his sister P's house. 

 

:unsure:  Except there were several things INCORRECT about that data. 

1) He also had 45 min drive to get out of the Metro area and then a 50 min drive....  :o

2)  His sister lives in an appartment...neglected to include an appt number when she gave us her address...SO....

 

At 3 AM, DH is knocking on the door of a HOUSE...with the same exact address P gave us, but it's "XYZ street"....instead of "XYZ street WEST".  :blink: Small town insanity.   

Either the folks were not home; did not wake up; or were too afraid to ANSWER THEIR DOOR!  :grinning-smiley-044:   He finally calls P on his cell and she tells him about the appartment thing....so he scoots quickly to rental car and LEAVES before someone does answer the door!  :008Laughing:

 

Then P can't figure out where he is  {about 2 blocks away, actually} but she had to dress and drive to McD's [which both of them could find]  to meet him and lead him back.  She doesn't know street names....just where she lives and drives.  Uh....helpful, P.  Really helpful at 3AM.  :buttercup: 

 

So he finally got to sleep for a short time on an air mattress in the living room.  His mom was DELIGHTED to see him when she woke up.  They've had a good day.  His mom goes to sleep frequently in a recliner with her feet up...in the middle of a sentence type frequently.  Forgets what they already talked about.  Breathing labored.  But she had a great day.  DH told P she could take a break and do something she'd enjoy since she's been full-time care for weeks now.  She decided to go play BINGO.  I know how it is to be locked in for weeks.  So DH is where he should be and I'm surviving here.  It would help if the snow would go away until he comes home. 

 

Keep praying.  Afterall, he did NOT get arrested at 3AM for disturbing someone's peace and sleep.  :lol:  Keep praying, please! 

 

MtRider  :grouphug:  Thanks.

 

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PS.......P just called me.  She's coming home from BINGO and her car runs out of gas 5 blocks from her apt.  [Her 30 yr old son is in BIG trouble.]  But she didn't have DH's cell # in her phone....so she could call DH to read her off her AAA number [which she also didn't have with her] so they can rescue her.  DH can't go rescue her cuz one of them must stay with their mom...even if she's gone to bed already. 

 

Can you see why DH doesn't visit family often.  :rolleyes: 

 

MtRider ....and she says she didn't even win at BINGO!  :grinning-smiley-044:

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16 minutes ago, Mt_Rider said:

PS.......P just called me.  She's coming home from BINGO and her car runs out of gas 5 blocks from her apt.  [Her 30 yr old son is in BIG trouble.]  But she didn't have DH's cell # in her phone....so she could call DH to read her off her AAA number [which she also didn't have with her] so they can rescue her.  DH can't go rescue her cuz one of them must stay with their mom...even if she's gone to bed already. 

 

Can you see why DH doesn't visit family often.  :rolleyes: 

 

MtRider ....and she says she didn't even win at BINGO!  :grinning-smiley-044:

 

Bless her soul. 

 

I am so glad that your DH is getting to visit his mom. 💜

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Heard from them today.  Having a good visit.  Got P home last nite, finally.  DH is going to help her switch batteries from her not-running car to the van that has a weak battery.  Besides everything else last nite, the AAA guy had to jump start her van after pouring in a gallon of gas.  Then they jumped it again this morning.  BUT Minn. is having terribly cold weather....well below zero...plus WINDCHILL!   And it's not a dry cold like CO.  DH doesn't like their weather at all....tho he left in a blizzard here.  He grew up there but we're not used to that now.

His mom is sleeping off and on today.  DH thinks all the excitement of his visit tired her out.  But...a good thing.  P got to go and shop, etc today while he had "mom duty".  She really can't be left to herself....forgets she can't walk w/o walker.  Cannot understand which pills she's taken and which to take now.  REALLY can't do that!  He's enjoying the visit and knows it was the very best plan to come right now.  :amen:

 

MtRider  ....today was easier for me!  :amen: 

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The spurt of energy/lucidity due to seeing DH has left MIL now.  DH and P are still dealing with getting P into a running, reliable vehicle.  Battery switch didn't work so he went to Walmart and bought the appropriate size.  Came in to EAT and get warm.  Miserable frigid weather tho not snowing.  He'll get it installed today.  He's feeling the affects of sorrow and constant LOUD noise.  We're a pretty quiet household ....except for one loud dog hearing coyotes, occasionally.   :rolleyes:    With MIL quite deaf now, TV is BLARING CONSTANTLY. :behindsofa:    ....we don't even have a TV.  Even tho he's freezing, he went outside to talk to me.  He didn't eat on time and with his pills, he neeeeds to.  I sent some good protein bars we use with him....because of this.  He ate one before they finally had a meal.  But he wasn't feeling well until the end of our conversation.  Then feeling better.  He's ready to come home.  Easier for him to deal with my folks than his...of course.  It sounds like she's ready for nursing home care with 24 hr staff.  Hopefully there will be a spot open for her soon, for P's sake.  One person cannot be STAFF...if they aren't getting sleep. 

 

I'm quite tired.  Had to stretch a lot before I could get out of bed.  It's been heavy manual labor with the snow complication.  We don't have a solo operation here.  Trying to do the least reasonably possible...to conserve energy.  Doing fine, but in emergency mode.

 

MtRider  :pray: 

Edited by Mt_Rider
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Hang in there MtR...both of you can do this.  You're "survivors"...hip hip horray! Seriously though, it's often easy for others to not understand the stress and discomfort that comes from you and him just being apart!  When I was in the hospital I hated it...I was so lonesome and worried about him.  I know you're feeling much more than that with all the other life events on your plate.  Hugs!

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DH is home :amen:    Good thing.  Each day I was getting less able to do it all.  This morning I started out a few steps to walk dog on road for her business trip.  Backtracked to add one of the many sticks I use for walking....in addition to my usual ski pole.  Took a few more steps and ....forget this!  R leg was lugging along like it was some ole fence post. 

 

Plan B:  take her by car to the dead end road.  She runs outside the car and I hang on to the retractable leash out the driver's window.  This has always been our Plan B....like back when I pulled the ligaments in my foot..  Used Plan B a lot then.  She's happy cuz she really gets to RUN...and then hits her brakes waaay faster than I do.  Thankful for the retractable leash.  :rolleyes: 

 

I took an extra nap this afternoon.  That HELPED.  Stamina is very short but I was able to walk her a short ways tonite after finishing other animals.  Then....I finally did up all the dishes, pots, pans from cooking on Thurs.  :dishes:    Just hadn't had it in me till now.  Whew!  Made up a frying pan of spaghetti noodles, sauce, sausage, and layers of cheese.  Heated in oven.....till DH gets home.  Made up two small salads for us. 

 

The code words are:  CONSERVE ENERGY!  This I have done....well enough. 

 

DH arrived and is VERY drained.  For a lot of reasons, of course.  It was a very good trip - and hardest trip.  But he was in the right place at the right time.  His mom perked up for a couple days and then began to 'diminish' again.  Not sure how long now....  One never knows.  But they both enjoyed and appreciated his visit. 

 

I'm so very glad he's home  ...and the dog is over the moon that he's back where he belongs !!!

 

MtRider ....THANK YOU ALLLL for encouragement and prayers!!!!!  :grouphug: 

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