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Everything posted by zzelle

  1. My hubby is at neurologist now for his check up to see if he has any permanent damage or not from his strokes.
  2. Thank you it is very hard. We take it moment by moment
  3. I totally understand how you feel. My son and I used to do everything together now we barely talk. He says you don't understand you haven't been through what I am going through things like that. I saw I know but I am your mom and I love you and I don't want you hurting and I am always here. He would rather talk to his friends than me. I feel left out.
  4. I just want to say hello everyone I get on every now again. I try to get on more often but with three special needs kids, my hubby still getting over his three mini strokes and work, animals everything else it is hard to find time. Glad to all of you. If you need to talk I will listen. I love this forum and the people thank you guys for the support.
  5. Everything just keeps coming at me. Our car had to be fixed $1600. Then I stepped out of my comfort zone went out for a job at work boss said go for it didn't even interview me gave it to someone else. Then my husband got sick he had 3 mini strokes. I again went out for a job at work one I have always wanted my boss said you had an excellent interview will let you know in a few days. I didn't get he gave it to a person from another school. I just don't know how much more I can take. I keep giving and giving and feels like my body is empty. It feels like my boss does not appreciate me. I have helped at the school this summer cleaning, painting 13 rooms 7 of the rooms by myself and he has not one time thanked me. I volunteered for this. He has thanked the other workers but not me. I have washed windows, walls, you name I have probably done. I usually don't care about that stuff but it hurts when he has not even acted like he has cared. I have given up all my time with my family for the school to make it look nice for the kids and staff and not once a thank you. Sorry I just needed to rant.
  6. Elliott is doing better he has started testosterone and his seeing his therapist. He is on medicine to stop his periods. We are doing better. My mom is finally coming around and accepting him.
  7. zzelle

    Comfort Zone

    Our principal told the other ladies that left thank you for a wonderful job but never said anything to me . I am the one who stayed through it all. Maybe I am being petty I don't know.
  8. zzelle

    Comfort Zone

    I love my job very much. I love working with the children and all the people. It is I believe that they walk all over me and don't appreciate what I do. I have given up almost my whole summer to make sure that our school is ready to come back to nice and beautiful. I am the only one who stayed. Our principal thanked our maintenance men which he should because they do an amazing job but I am right there beside them and he didn't even say thank you in person to me. I don't even care about thank yous usually but when no one says it at all it hurts.
  9. Our son Elliott finally got to start his testosterone shot. I got to give it to him. He takes it once a month. We are making progress with his coming out. My mom is becoming more accepting. I am so proud of him. Love him so much.
  10. I have gotten out of my comfort zone twice now to apply for a different position at the place I work which is a school and both. The first time I didn't even get an interview and this time he said I had a wonderful interview but he chose someone else. I give up I am done I can not handle stepping out of my comfort zone and being rejected. I have been there 7 years. I always do what I am told. Never miss a day. I am the only 1 who stayed and painted this summer for the teachers to have their rooms done. I have cleaned and not missed a day. I was always told I would not amount to anything and I am starting to believe it. I keep getting passed over for the next person and I am over it. I will go do my job like everyone else and get paid go home. I am the one who leaves my lunch early to help clean tables so the kids can eat while the other IAs are standing and talking. Sorry I just hate that I get walked all over. Thanks for listening.
  11. It is horrible to lose a pet we lost 2 this year. I am just getting to the point where I don't want to get out of bed or go to work. I love my job but I just don't feel like doing anything anymore. I don't know what it is. I don't know if it is if it is like I don't feel like I don't matter. There is just so much stuff going on and I am wore out mentally and just so hard to keep going. I do though for my family. I would do anything for them.
  12. Thank you everyone I hope all of you have a wonderful year this year
  13. We have had so much happen this last year and I was hoping this year would be better but so far no. I am just so tired. I have 3 special needs children and things just keep coming at us. Oh well 1 day at a time
  14. Thank you all for your support
  15. Thanks everyone so much that helps so much. That is what we are trying to do we just want her to be happy. We love her no matter what.
  16. Thank you for your kind words. We are just letting her do her thing and letting her know we love her no matter what. We told her no surgery or anything like that till she is an adult and she has agreed. It is like she wants to be a boy with her friends and have them call her I don't know her name she has chosen. Then she still dresses like a boy hair but wants us to call her by her given name. She gets so upset when we say the wrong pronoun for a person who is bisexual or asexual all of that I tell her I don't know all of them. She gets mad and says they or them. Thanks for listening
  17. I don't know were else to say all of this so here goes nothing. In August our daughter told us she was a lesbian she liked girls and her girlfriend just broke up with her. We had no clue. We talked about and we got her into therapy and such because of her depression. Then she had a huge meltdown were she tried to cut her own hair and did not go well. We got her new meds. Several weeks pass and I ask her what is going on and she tells me she fells like she should have been born a boy. She does not like being a girl. She chose a boy name for her friends to call her but at home she still wants us to call her by her given name because she is too close to us and says it hurts her and she is not ready for us to call her by her guy name she has chosen because she is afraid it will hurt us. She is our only daughter. We want her to be happy no matter what. Please only positive feedback I have had enough bad from others and just needed a safe place I could get it all out. Thank you all for listening
  18. No I don't but that sounds like a wonderful idea thank you
  19. My stress keeps going up my husband's uncle passed January 13. His mother has fluid on her lungs and congested heart failure we have to wait on more testing. Things just keep going from bad to worse. I thought this was going to be a good year boy was I wrong. Well my daughter is doing better and bringing her grades up so that is a positive. We are all alive another positive. We have a home, food more then some have so I am thankful.
  20. Thank you all so much it has been so hard and still is but we take it day by day minute by minute.
  21. Sorry I have not been on here we have just had so much going on. My daughter has chosen her path and she is still very confused and stressed on how she feels. She sees her therapist to talk every 2 weeks. Our boys are still fighting. I just go day by day.
  22. I have had so much stress this year I don't know if I can handle any more. Our daughter is having such a rough time right now in her life not knowing what path she wants to choose. Our boys are fighting like cats and dogs. I am just ready for something good to happen.
  23. Sorry everyone he is almost back to his old self. We have been busy with our kids yesterday was Camp-We-Can for our 2 boys and my hubby and daughter had a day together. We have done this for 5 years now the boys love. Tomorrow is our anniversary 22 years.
  24. zzelle

    Lose weight

    I have had a couple of cheat days where we have had french fries or a little bit of corn mashed potatoes chips or such then I get right back on and not loose sight or feel guilty
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