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Romans 1:21-23


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I'm feeling very quiet today. All that has been going on is currently buried deep in my heart because I just don't understand. That's ok though...for some reason I'm able to breathe.


I do want to take a moment and extend a very genuine, heartfelt thank You who have been burdened by the Lord to cover me in prayer. I don't think y'all realize (I never realized myself, till now) how critically important these prayers are that we cover each other with. God knew that I was heading into this situation, and before I even arrived, I have discovered that He burdened a few people very strongly to pray for me. That kinda surprises me, and I guess kinda touches my heart that He would do that.


I have a fleeting thought that I'm barely able to touch, but not grasp yet, and it has to do along the lines of "the Body of Christ". Perhaps it's hitting me a little strongly because I tend to be an ultra independent kind of person, who bursts outta the starting gate feeling quite comfortable going solo. Through a few experiences in life, I thought I had learned valuable lessons on not counting on other people too much (we're all fallible) and had eased into a very comfortable position where it was just me and God...me and God.


I many times try to relate my spiritual experiences in human terms, so the best I can figure out so far is that I have once again gone under the 'spiritual knife'...I'm in intensive care from a critical spiritual surgery where I don't understand why the surgery was necessary, I don't quite understand what was wrong that required this surgery, and I'm laying here in spiritual ICU hurting, and drawing inward. See, it feels like (not saying this was actual but it sure does feel like this) like I almost died on the operating table (I know God wouldn't have ever let that happen but in all honesty I'm kinda scared right now cause I feel like I almost did). It feels like I let go of His hand and started free falling and that was incredibly frightening and scary. BUT, I'm beginning to see a little of His faithfulness, when He burdened a few of You to begin praying for me. If I have to try to put it into words that we, as humans can understand, it feels as if when I lost my grip on Him, He called some of you to reach out and grab onto me through prayer. Y'all hung on, with your cries rising before His Holy Throne, and He heard you, and was moved by your faithfulness to His leading in your lives.


I know this sounds dramatic, and I'm not trying to be dramatic...I'm just trying to put into simple terms what has happened to me. I'm actually a little embarassed sharing out this...revealing the depth that makes me feel very vulnerable, but oh well, what can I say.


So anyway, I don't know or understand much yet, but I am beginning to understand a few tiny things. I'm beginning to see this critical importance that we all have as that "Body of Christ"...I don't totally comprehend it yet, but I'm dead serious when I say that I don't know where I'd be right now if y'all hadn't of been praying for me.


I also am learning something else. See, when I did the first study here in Romans, after I did that I felt really burdened to ask for prayers of protection, but I just knew that this study would come under attack...that I would come under attack from the enemy. On Sunday, when my study got deleted a couple of times, I began to get irritated and ticked and I did my infamous "I am going to get this study done if it's the last thing I do...nothing is going to stop me, I am going to MAKE it happen..."


On Monday, when my server people pulled my site down, I was really getting ticked. Ticked at the enemy, ticked at the server people, but once again on a mission to move mountains and make things happen just because "I can". That was a humbling experience because it was nothing short of frustrating and nobody would 'hear' the reasonable argument I was presenting.


So, on Tuesday, once again, I was bound and determined to get this study done. It was my central focus, and "I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I was going to do this, that and the other".


I never expected, nor saw coming, the blow that I got hit with. I was absolutely decimated and got hit in the most vulnerable and foundationally critical part of my life. It has to do with something between me and the Lord and nobody else and I'll refrain for now from sharing about it because I still don't understand enough yet.


But, like I said, I've begun to understand a few things...first was how critically important we are in the position as "the Body of Christ", supporting each other, praying for each other, etc. This position that we all have IN Him, has taken a very serious turn, and our position there is more important now than I ever understood in the past.


The second thing the Lord has showed me is that my "I, I, I, I, I, I, I" ain't worth 2 cents. It doesn't matter how strong I am, how determined I am, how committed I am, how 'whatever' I am. I just got sucker punched by the enemy, God has allowed it because I know that He's teaching me something that is very critical to my foundational relationship with Him. He brought to mind that scripture in Zachariah where He says, "Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, thus sayeth the Lord". So I now comprehend, not only with my mind, but with my heart through actual experience, that there is no way "I" can do anything. I can't do this study, I can't finish it, I can't do a thing. It will be by His power, His Spirit, that this study will be complete. This places me in a very dependent position with the Lord (which is scriptural). That's about all I know about that right now.


I am however, in absolute awe, at the precision that God works in our lives. Not only has He blessed me with so many of you, who care enough to take time to remember me in prayer, but last night, one of my most dearest friends, came for a visit for a few days. She could have come back in August, or next June, but God had planned on her coming the day after I fell apart. I've known her about 10 years, she is now a missionary out there in the world, on the front lines of this spiritual battlefield we live in here on earth. She's stayed loyal to our friendship through good times and bad, and she's one of the few that I can be the most vulnerable with and tell just about everything to. She's a mature woman in the Lord, I totally trust her counsel, and I know, without a shadow of a doubt that this visit, that was planned a month ago, was not only just a nice opportunity to spend some time with my beloved friend. This visit is a God thing and He has sent her on another missionary trip, but this time it's in her own country with one of her own friends. I haven't had the opportunity to sit with her and share what has happened...last night when I was driving back home to the mountains, I tried to give her just a thumb nail sketch and I could hardly talk because the tears just flowed. I am so grateful that she is here, like I've never been before. So...


Heavenly Father,


For someone that feels exceptionally quiet right now, I sure can still talk alot.


Thank You for bringing Jean here, right now, at this moment, back into my life. Normally the vast Atlantic ocean seperates us, but today, she's in my home. I'm in absolute awe.


Thank You Father, for those other brothers and sisters in Christ, who love me enough to take time out of their own lives, to interceed in prayer for me. I just ask Father God that You would extend an extra special blessing in their lives, because I am so grateful and thankful for them.


Help me Lord...help me understand cause I'm still feeling very shy and wary.


And THIS, I don't even hafta ask for, because I already know that You will NOT allow the enemy to destroy me. I know that You are already binding and removing any attempts they are trying to make in my life to undermine Your perfect will for me. I already know that it is because of Your Son's work on the Cross and His resurrection, that we can be free. I already know that, as You have said in Ephesians, that "God placed all things under His feet, and appointed Him to be head over everything for the church, which is the body, the fullness of Him who fills everything in every way."


So Father, please help me..may Your perfect will be done.


Oh, and btw Father, You're going to hafta do the study today.


I can't.


In Jesus Name I pray,




21Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.


22Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,


23And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things.


In verse 21, "Because that, knowing God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were they thankful", the rvbv talks about how every human knows he should give over his entire being to God's worship and glory, and that he should be consistantly thankful for life, it's blessings. It talks about how men refused to worship God and be grateful and instead became 'godless' and thankless. Even though they make this decision, they could not totally be free from their conscience, so the rvbv states it became a form of 'idolatry'. The rvbv talks about how at first, man resorted to vain speculations and their own manufactured reasonings to escape the thought of God and duty. The judicial result of that choice became "Their heart (the whole inner man, the seat of knowledge and feeling), became dark (lost the little light it had), and wandered blindly in the mazes of olly". It goes on further and suggests in taking a moment to reflect on the fact that these choices are an illustration of man knowing, but refusing, to recognize their Creator...that they eat from His hand daily, but refuse to offer one thanksgiving.


In verse 22, "Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools", man rejects the light of God's knowledge in their consciences, applying their own wisdom and ended up becoming nothing more than fools.


The rvbv states, Z"The silliness of these "modern" shallow-pan days! How men are rushing back to the old pagan pit out of which God's Word and His gospel would have delivered them! They suck up sin; they welter in wickedness; they profess to be wise! They sit at the feet of "professors" whose breath is spiritual cyanide. The idolize the hog-sty doctrins of a rotten Freud: and count themselves "wise"! They say, "God is not a person; men evolved from monkeys; morals are mere old habits; self-enjoyment, self-expression, indulgence of all desires - this," they say, "is the path of wisdom."...Now if someone objects, saying, This is a strange introduction to the gospel of God's grace, we answer, It lies here before us, this awful indictment of Romans One, and cannot be evaded! Moreover until man knows his state of sin, he wants no grace. Shall pardon be spoken of before the sinner is proved a sinner? While the evidence is being brought in, the whole attention of the court is upon that. If the evidence of guilt be insufficient or inconclusive, there is no necessity for a pardon!


Preachers and teachers have soft-pedalled sin, until the fear of God is vanishing away. McCheyne used to say, "A holy minister is an awful weapon in the hands of God." But a preacher who avoids telling men the truth about their sin as here revealed, is the best tool of the devil."


In verse 23, "And changed the glory of the incorruptible God", incorruptibility is the essence of God's being. "From the beginningless eternity past to the endless eternity to come, He is the glorious self-existant One."


Watchman Nee states, "that to change the glory of God into anything else is to forsake Him and to make an idol.


I think that just about says it all.


Heavenly Father,


Thank You. Thank You that You are God and none else.


May Your Spirit bear witness to our spirit, as to Your truth found in Your Word.


In Jesus Name,

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(((Darlene))) I'm so glad Homesteader is there! God's timing in our lives is so perfect and such a comfort!


I hope your visit is wonderful and that the situation you are facing will 'grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace'!



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Everywhere I turn, I hear that Christians [people I know personally] have been feeling a "Call to Arms" in the past couple years. This call is not for any physical battle on this earthly realm. But a calling to BE READY....REALLY READY spiritually for hard times ahead. [be they the final end times or not....that is not important that we know...or HE would have made it more clear.]


Everyone I talk to feels like they have been taken out of classes in Life 101 and put into classes of Life 505 or 808. And it's got more than a few of us gasping. [OK, maybe we're doing some whining too... lol ] You are not alone in these urgent lessons, Darlene. He's calling us to deeper, more accurate, more doable understanding of Himself and our place in His universe. We need to view/know Him more accurately or we always, inadvertant or not, create out of our own understanding -- an idol. A misrepresentation of His Holy Self.


This Call To Arms means it's time to go into the attic and under the bed to find our dusty/rusty armor of God and set to polishing and sharpening. We can't stand for righteousness if we have not cleaned out our own straying ways or misconceptions. Our lazy, opulent times for Christianity in this nation might be changing. Even if we are not openly persecuted [may it never be.... praying ] we are not in a majority of lifestyle anymore, it seems. It's so hard to live in opulence and remain steadfast to Christ's principles. To resist making even HIM in our image.....cuz we're so 'all that'.







.......yikes, where did all that come from? Just some thots rolling around in me lately and spilling outta my fingers. Urgency for spiritual readiness......



MtRider [Gotta go bump up the Ephesians study and re-read the parts of my armor I'm needing to clean the rust and dust off of..... ]

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A call to arms is a good way to put it, or being called out too. Both have effected the very foundations of my beliefs the past few years...not the least of which was to leave my faith in my religion (Mennonite) for something so different I don't even think it has a name lol. But after the initial hurt wore off, He has replaced it with an awesome time of learning that is still going on. That was the calling out part.


The call to arms part is to be a silent prayer warrior. But this place, here, I have to speak up. Darlene, you have taught so many of us so many things and not just for prepping either. You have shared so much with us that it's no suprise to me that so many are praying especially hard for you right now, including me!


The body is a wonderful and fearfully made thing...not all are called to be prayer warriors or "arms" of the body lets call them. And not all are called to teach or "legs" lets call them. But they are all needed to form that body. And it can be painful when the grafting in starts. But we are here for you and will continue to cover you in prayer. I hope your visit is a good one and may He bless you both! bighug





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