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Inquiring minds wanna know?????Can this survive the censors ax?


Trip

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TWENTY EIGHT LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

 

1 My husband and I divorced over religious differences... he thought he was God and I didn't.

 

2. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

 

3. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

 

4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

 

5. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

 

6. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

 

7. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

 

8. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

 

9. I'm not a complete idiot -- some parts are missing.

 

10. Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

 

11. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning medicine.

 

12. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

 

13. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

 

14. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

 

15. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

 

16. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

 

17. Wrinkled was not one of the things I wanted to be when I grew up.

 

18. Procrastinate now!

 

19. I Have a degree in Liberal Arts; do you want fries with that?

 

20. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

 

21. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

 

22. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

 

23. They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

 

24. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

 

25. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.

 

26. Ham and eggs... A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.

 

27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

 

28. I smile because I don't know what the heck is going on.

 

 

:D :D

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This is hilarious. Really funny. Sorry I wasn't able to catch the censored email. Send it to me privately, Trip. :)

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27. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

 

 

HEY YOU ARE WRONG!!! Come live in my head for a few weeks. MY kids tell me I hum while I am eatting. Songs are constantly running through my head, and if they aren't in my head, they are just outside the window -- though the medications take care of that for the most part. LOL

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The others were political. The owner of this site has asked us not to post political threads or they will be deleted without comment.

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