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I need to share something...

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I'm out of town for a few days...God knows and has ordained it for a reason. The reason doesn't matter, the fact that He has ordained it, does.


I don't have my study guides to do the Romans study this morning, but for whatever reason, I just feel the need to share, so I figured I'd go with the flow and see where this post will take me. Blind faith? lol


I was browsing different forums here on the site, reading peoples posts, listening to what they were saying in the typewritten word, and listening to what they were perhaps thinking in their heart and mind.


As I drove out of town yesterday and listened to 3rd Day, the Holy Spirit was sharing so much with me. I found myself saying, "oh wow...oh wow", as He opened my eyes to several things.


I wrote recently, and quite extensively, about the things that occurred during my recent fast. As is customary for me, I tend think, "Ok Lord, wow, that is so kewl...I now 'get' it...let me organize this into my mind and life now and we'll see what You will show me next..."


Not surprisingly, the Lord most times says, "ummmmmmmmmm...wait. I'm not finished. There is more."


So yesterday, as I travelled through a snow storm that hit just as I was leaving...as I drove across icy roads, I couldn't help but notice that any accidents or mishaps that happened or traffic jams, always seemed to be on the other side of the road, going in the opposite direction. As I write that I just sense that there is a deeper spiritual significance that I need to ponder on, but that is not the purpose of this post....it was just something I thought about as I'm writing.


Anyway, I as I was driving and listening to the music and praying, His Spirit began to open my heart and mind to an additional perspective of all that happened while I was on my fast just a few short days ago. It's another way to for me to view the profound encounter I have with my Savior, and after reading in the other forums this morning, I feel led to share this here.


I tend to take spiritual experiences and liken them to human things I can relate to and understand. Many times when the Lord is doing a work in me, I liken it to going into 'spiritual surgery', where He takes His holy, spiritual knife, and begins to remove what He wills gone, and plants that which He wills planted.


So, as I was driving yesterday and reflecting and pondering my recent encounter with Him, He brought to mind the times when He's taken me into the 'spiritual operating room'. This particular operating room however, was not the normal, sterile environment that we naturally associate with surgery. This time, it was in my natural environment up in the mountains, likened to something I love doing, which is gardening.


You know how when you're working in a garden, or landscaping, you take your shovel to dig holes? That was the imagery that I likened it to.


So, as I was being wheeled into the operating room, as is often the case, I had no idea why lol...I just knew I needed to go. I was placed once again on the operating table and He took His holy shovel and began to place the tip against my heart. I wasn't even in pain, yet I began to fight and struggle and argue with Him.


"No! I don't know if I want to do this," I said.


"Trust Me," He replied.


As He began to slide His tool deeper into my heart, I vascilated between "NO" and "Your will be done". There were times I would grab the handle of that shovel and take it from His hands. There were times when I'd hand it back over to Him and ask that He continue. Back and forth I would go, which mirrors my struggle in real life as He walks me through the letting go process. He finally reached the depth He desired a few days ago, when I grabbed the handle out of His hands and made a decision that enough was enough, and decided to pull it out. I was going to get up off that operating table and walk out that door, of course grabbing His hand, but drawing the boundries and living a life without undergoing that critical and much needed surgery. Surely it's not so bad to live as a cripple? The Lord's desire was to operate to make me whole, and I was willing to settle as a cripple.


Anyway, I've already written about the process I went through, which culminated in me finally 'signing the waiver' of my 'rights to myself'. He had brought in reinforcements in the form of my friend, knowing that hearing the same thing from a trusted friend would eventually help me see things His way.


Yesterday, it was as if I was seeing this all in my mind...laying flat on my back, the struggle with the shovel, and the ultimate end when He slid that shovel deep, and lifted out a huge chunk of my heart that I had always known.


The POINT IS...He then reached and placed, into the hole He had just made, the Truth of my place in His Son. He planted it deep because that's how He does things with me, and as He began to fill in around that which He had planted, He did not use the 'dirt' He had just removed...He instead used this fertile 'ground' to pack this foundational truth that was planted:


"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God...and His righteousness. And all these things will be added unto you..."


Over and over and over again, that song, that Truth swirled in my mind. I didn't notice it at first until it was difficult not to. It was strong and holy and loud. I began to listen and I began to ponder those words..."See ye FIRST the Kingdom of God."




First Darlene. Get your eyes off of "this" and "that". When you place your eyes on 'this and that', you are not seeking Me, you are seeking 'that' and that has been part of my problem. When I place my eyes on those things, those circumstances, those issues, those concerns, those worries, my heart begins to fill with dread. "Get your eyes OFF of that" He says, and place your eyes on Me".


Now trust me, I know that song, that Truth...I have it memorized by heart. But it has never, ever, hit me as hard as it did in that moment. I believe, and know, that it was because I had finally bent my will to His, when I allowed Him to take that holy shovel and dig that chunk out of my heart, that allowed Him to finally plant deeply, that which He wills to take root, "my position in Christ". That was the gift He was planting deep inside of me.


I marveled however, at how He then followed that with a command, and finally a promise.


"Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and My righteousness", He commanded.


"And all these things shall be added unto you.", He promised.


I don't know if I'm explaining this well, but as I was browsing the forums earlier and reading the different things people are talking about, it reminded me of how many times, when I open my eyes and look at the storm clouds that are coming, a huge weight descends on my heart. This recent experience of mine is teaching me to stretch my arms wide, taking my position in Christ, looking up to the Father and making the decision to seek Him first, trusting that He will add 'these things' (whatever 'these things' are...trials or blessings, it matters not).


For me, and I can only speak for myself, and share what 'clicks' for me, but I am sensing that this position, this outlook, is what will strengthen me to make it through these storms ahead. My own thinking and need for self preservation (at least self preservation as I've always known and understood it), is not going to cut it in the days ahead.


I just felt the need to share the above, and to suggest that we all, seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, regardless of the battles ensuing around us, refusing to take our eyes off of Him, filled with a defiance against the enemy to hang, just as our Lord Jesus Christ did, in Him, where the battle for our souls was won.


Ok Lord, I wrote it. Bless them Father God.

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Thank you Darlene! I've found that I'm feeling that same feeling very strongly (these last few days) that no matter how dark/grim it will get - I just need to keep my eyes on Him and do what He tells me to do/prepare etc.

Praying you have a safe journey.

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There is a marvelous sermon, (sadly I can't remember who delivered it) which reminds us that 'Sunday's coming!' Paraphrasing (rather badly I'm afraid) the gyst is that the enemy is hooting and hollering, declaring victory because Jesus is crucified and the enemy thinks he's won. It's Saturday, Saturday afternoon, Saturday night. But Sunday's coming. Jesus will rise, He will win, and the enemy will be defeated.


We have to remember, this is only Saturday, and Sunday's coming!


Thanks Darlene for sharing.

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""Seek ye first the Kingdom of God, and My righteousness", He commanded."



I see of late, quite a few people who are going through this same thing Darlene. Almost just like you described, a spiritual surgery. I have had my own surgery done and we wont go through that here. You can pm me later if you want to know about it. Only thing I would add to the above quote for you and I have been thinking about this all day...


Seek Him first in all things with your eyes and heart wide open!


Yes, that is hard to do for some of us who would rather stay comfortable in what we know and do. Keeping your eyes and heart wide open to Him means getting outside your comfort zone and often may lead to truths that will move you away from that comfort! But He is getting ready His Bride and the Remnant. I see it over and over again almost daily now. Just keep your eyes on Him...



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Lord my God, I pray you do surgery on me, Lord I need you in evey inch of my body. I only want you flowing out of my body. When people look at me, I want them to see YOU LORD. LOVE, GOOD and KINDNESS. Lord there are areas in my heart and soul and spirit that need you desperately, I struggle everyday with these things that are not of YOU.


LORD only you know how to work with this, everyday I come on this forum and I read these wonderful topics and I find that I am not the only person in a struggle, thank you Jesus I am not alone.



Lord I pray that you lift all these wonderful people higher on this forum and bless them, and let them know you are JESUS CHRIST, LORD of their lives.


Thank you, thank you, thankyou




Edited by Mel
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Lord my God, I pray you do surgery on me, Lord I need you in evey inch of my body. I only want you flowing out of my body. When people look at me, I want them to see YOU LORD. LOVE, GOOD and KINDNESS. Lord there are areas in my heart and soul and spirit that need you desperately, I struggle everyday with these things that are not of YOU.


LORD only you know how to work with this,...






Standing in agreement Lord, for this is Your will...


"As the deer pants for the water brooks,

So my soul pants for You, O God."


Surely Your Spirit is fanning this thirst Father. I know that it is pleasing to You and touches Your heart that our hearts are so desperate for You.


Your Word says in response to the above thirst:


"Hope in God, for I shall yet praise Him,

The help of my countenance and my God."


In Jesus Name,

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