Online Scamming

[Crazy4Canning]

So. Please let me share my week.

 

Monday, I head over to my parents' apartment to review plans for the next day, the day my dad will be turning himself in at the courthouse. I'm searching for the phone bill (of which I've never seen) when I see an envelope from their old property. I open it, hoping it was the check and all I find is a stub and a list of what monies they debited. I should have known that they would be nitpicky, for they kept $300 of the $1500 for what should have been normal maintenance, and did not mention the remaining $300 of rent. The reasons were shaky at best. Fine, it's in the past, where is the remaining $1200?

 

My dad CASHED the check and sent $700 to scammers. Oh yes. There was 1.5 million waiting for him in England, and he was next in line to win the lottery.

 

I was incredulous. Dad was so sincere. He said, "God told me to do it."

 

My response? "Dad, I'm so upset I can't talk about this. Understand me, that money you gave away was my last month's tuition. It was ONE YEAR of vacation my husband had to cash out to pay for my tuition. Believe me when I say, I can't and won't let you pay bills any more or have any cash. We will talk about this later."

 

We agreed on a time for me to pick him up in the morning and I left. I was furious. I made it home and then I dissolved into angry tears. To my knowledge, this was #5 of money fraud/ scam dealing.

 

Tuesday was literally icy in the morning. When I dropped Dad off, he was a wall of strength. Any Christian would have been proud to say, "Here is a strong man." He just smiled at those around him. When I realized he put his cell phone down as a point of contact and neither he nor I had it with us. I went back to my parents apartment to get it. After visiting with my mom, I still hadn't found the phone bill, so I asked if I could look for it. With my mother's permission, I looked in every drawer, bureau, and shelf he's been into, aside from the outside shed that houses tools.

 

It was enlightening and saddening.

 

Seems the online scamming has been going on for MUCH longer than we thought. I found receipts for multiple money sending, and cash withdrawals from the bank. Still not finding the phone bill, I had mother's permission and my husband's help to access his emails. Upon doing so, I realized he's been sending money to the Nigerians, England, and other scammers since at LEAST January of 2009. Inside of 4 months, I estimated just over $5000.

 

What is sickening, is that every time he's get money - often from ME for helping renovate our house, he would send it off via wire transfer. Nigeria, England, French Guinea, Liberia, Albania...the list goes on. The dates he sent the money matched within a DAY of when I paid him. He was neglecting all their other bills, aside from rent to do this. Suddenly, we understood WHY he was always hustling for cash - he had to so he *something* could pay off and it never did.

 

I was just sick. I actually had an anxiety attack, something I've not had before and don't care to repeat.

 

So, since then, I've been checking his emails. I've changed the number on his cell phone and put a parental lock on it. (I pay the bill and own the phone.)

 

I've also started papers for becoming guardian of their 'person and estate' with my state. This means that I and the court will be responsible for their well being, since my mother is incapable (blind) and we can't trust him.

 

The day he was home, Wednesday, my husband and I staged an Intervention. He was amused, at the least. He's not once apologized for this behavior. He doesn't see it as wrong, for people offered to help. When we asked him, when does God offer you strings? When do real people talk rudely to you and bully you? (Aside from his brother.) He didn't know.

 

To top it off, he also took out a small cash express loan - from a payday loan place. He used his car title. He did get the title back, but they were leaving ugly messages on his voice mail. The only way out of that debt may be to just pay it. I think (hope) it's only a couple of hundred. If it's NOT, we may be in for a bigger battle than I thought.

 

 

The silver lining might be that if he is declared "crazy" or as having a form of dementia, the lawsuit with his brother may be dismissed. Regardless of what happens, I'm filing guardianship papers tomorrow morning - these 'grant me' permission to act on their behalf and prevent me from giving my dad cash for ANY reason without a receipt. Also, it protects me from any sort of dishonest dealing (not that I would). The good news is that the court will mandate a physical and psych eval.

 

So, I've had a week off from my doctoral work (intentional) because of my Presentation on Tuesday. I did get some rest this weekend and will be renewed for the week.

 

I sincerely hope this slows down. I can't imagine what else could happen.

[Cat]

Finally *knowing* is just part of the beginning of a sort of healing. I will continue to pray for all of you.

 

[Annarchy]