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Foregiveness - D.Wilkerson states this concept very well...

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Forgiveness..... Us giving it to others. Receiving it from others. Receiving from God


Anyone you know has an annoying habit...or sin? Forgiving them {over and over and over as needed} is the solution.


Father, I forgive ____________. S/he caused me pain and I felt ___________. But as a function of my will [not emotion necessarily ....yet], I choose to forgive them....because YOU forgave me so much. If for no other reason..that is reason enough. I dare not be like the debtor forgiven huge debts yet who turns to another and refuses to forgive a small debt. I will forgive, not because of any merit or even sorrow/change in her/him. Just like YOUR forgiveness wasn't because of my merit.....or because I changed. Like YOU did...I want to forgive like that. Please take back the 'ground' I've been giving to evil....due to unforgiveness.


Ahem........repeat as needed until you FEEL it as well as CHOOSE it. Seriously! Ask me how I KNOW!





Go read what David Wilkerson has to say about the topic.





MtRider :amen:

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I might note that there are some issues in certain relationships that you can FORGIVE....must forgive. But you might not necessarily need to live with if there is no repentance and progress toward change.


Like certain behaviors in the other that can be quite harmful....if you stay in contact with them.


MtRider ....but to free yourself and sit with clear conscious with God...forgive. If only from a distance. Be wise.

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We've been reminded, again, of a hurt, that, sadly will continue on for a while. I've forgave, had to do it over and over and over, every time the incident has to be dealt with. We no longer have any contact with the party, nor ever will again, God willing.


However, 7 x 70 (7 x 70 ) = ........., not enough to take away the pain or the ripples and waves that still come.


In time, I am sure, this too shall pass. Like my Mother used to say to me, "...maybe they NEED a lot of prayers..." ....so be it.


IDK if forgiving has helped, only God does. However, each time I have to deal with the consequences, 7 x 70 times, doesn't seem enough.

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The next D Wilkerson part on this:





I have experienced the effect post-forgiveness. The tremendous release from my side. :hapydancsmil: "Their" side doesn't really matter in this equation...tho their repentance and turning from that would be so good for them. But that's between them and God. Not really our business except in our compassion.


I have experienced freedom from one who doesn't even know the hurt caused...and never will. Some are really OLD NEWS ....and are rather silly to still be stirred up about anyway. Yet these incidents needed a formal time of consciously forgiving and releasing.


I've also experienced freedom in the case of ongoing difficult [but not dangerous] relationship. These type include the 7 X 70......since new incidents will occur. Yet.....in THIS case, I chose to stay in the relationship. Not under this person's control but definitely in relationship. It is definitely NOT ALL TOXIC. For what is toxic and/or hurtful .....I ...forgive ....repeatedly. Well first, I try to bite my tongue really quick so as not to make the situation worse and be faulted myself! I also lower expectations and try to increase understanding of how much this person actually has to work with, within their damaged selves. This thinking is often enough to increase compassion. Well, sometimes it takes time to slide reluctantly into that frame of mind ....but it helps and it's accurate!


Until the next hurtful/irrational comment is made.


Then.....the forgiveness begins again...........because Jesus is forgiving my failures at least that many times too. :shrug:


In this case, when there is no danger, I choose to take the moments of bitter, so that I can continue the sweet. In this case, it is worth it.




But I have also had relationships that I've chosen to end. We are called to be wise. But when I remember those relationships...usually there is no bitterness harbored. IF I find myself remembering back and some anger/ pain rises up.....I go over the forgiveness again. Even after years of peace on these discarded relationships....sometimes a new layer of pain/bitterness is revealed. Not that we haven't forgiven in the past. It's merely a new layer that has been brought to our attention BY THE HOLY SPIRIT. When HE does reveal more......choose to forgive and move on....again.



Sometimes there are repeat episodes that are much harder to let go of my end of the tug-of-WAR rope. :motz_6: [i like that little smilie. It makes me laugh, but sometimes I look like that. Or feel like that inside. ] I figure that eventually, between me and the Holy Spirit, we'll get those set out of the way and replaced by HIS peace too. :amen:



MtRider .....I'm finding there is more room for Gratitude and Thanksgiving when we've done our forgiveness homework. :pray:

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The guy, his flower pot, and my injured DD.


This is what came to mind tonite. I burned again about the INTENSE INSENSITIVITY of the guy as I renewed the memory of that episode. He hurt my daughter! :angry:


Then I remembered all the times God has been bringing up past events that still burn when I remember. I had to come here to read thru what I wrote when I began this thread about forgiveness. Cuz this one is an episode of Mama Bear. Yet I still had to forgive the guy. Again.



About 16 years ago, DD1 was severely injured by a hit-and-run driver in Hawaii. [another one I had to forgive] I flew out to be at the hospital with her and DD2. We spent the first few days praying she'd live. And the next couple weeks hoping she'd get thru multiple surgeries to save the leg. Finally we were able to get her back to her apartment. We all packed her up to go live with DD2 and SIL. She was too severely injured to live alone yet.


DD2 had a ground floor apartment with no steps to walk in her door. When I arrived the first time, I noted a pot of flowers just to the right of the door. Knowing I was using a cane [usually right side use] and DD1 was very unstable on her crutches, I moved it just a few inches around the corner to the other wall.


The next day it was back in the way again so I asked DD1. She said it wasn't hers but the upstairs neighbor's. So I took it up there and set it on their landing.


The next day we returned from a doctor visit. DD1 and I were crossing the lawn when I saw that STUPID flower pot back in the way right next to DD1's door again. I hustled ahead to move it so DD1's crutches wouldn't be caught up in it......and I looked back to see her lose balance. I raced the few steps back to brace her. Unfortunately with my disability, I wasn't fast or stable enough to keep both of us from falling backwards.


She screamed in pain from the nearly severed leg and broken hip. I was stuck underneath her, not sure I even slowed her fall much. DD2 and SIL ran from the car they were unloading to help first DD1 and then later me. The shock of it dumped my functioning and I was immobilized too.


I can't remember but I think as SIL helped me to the door, I threw that flower pot across the yard. The guy came to complain later.



:sigh: ....tonite isn't the first time I've gone thru the exercise of forgiving that one. So self-absorbed that he would intrude on anyone's space because of his petty needs. But this time, God showed me the 'prison' that those people inhabit. If something went wrong during childhood to the extent that compassion for another's point of view cannot be achieved.....the flower pot man is much more disabled than me or DD1. And he may be to this day.


So tonite I forgave the young man that he was long ago, and I was able to honestly pray that God had gotten him to mature.....freed him from the prison of utter selfishness.


Odd....the variety of incidents we cling to for years? ....course, he DID hurt my daughter! That's always a strong emotion.


MtRider ....'nother one down. More to go, I'm sure. :amen:

Edited by Mt_Rider
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