Andy Rooneys Wit and Wisdom about Older Women

[Dee]

If you're not an older woman yet, this will give you encouragement! If

you are an older woman and you didn't love Andy Rooney before, this may

change your mind!

 

Andy Rooney says: As I grow in age, I value older women most of all.

Here are just a few reasons why:

 

An older woman will never wake you in the middle of the night to ask,

What are you thinking? She doesn't care what you think.

 

An older woman knows herself well enough to be assured in who she is,

what she is, what she wants and from whom. Few women past the age of 50 give

a

**** what you might think about her.

 

An older single woman usually has had her fill of meaningful relationships

and commitment.The last thing she needs in her life is another dopey,

clingy, whiny, dependent lover!

 

Older women are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at

the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you

deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away

with it.

 

Most older women cook well. They care about cleanliness and are generous

with praise, often undeserved.

 

An older woman has the self-assurance to introduce you to her women friends.

A younger woman with a man will often ignore even her best friend because

she doesn't trust the guy with other women. Older women couldn't care less.

 

Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to an

older woman. They always know.

 

An older woman looks good wearing bright red lipstick. This is not true of

younger women or drag queens.

 

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off you are

a jerk if you are acting like one.

 

Yes, we praise older women for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's

not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coifed babe of 70 there is a

bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22

year old waitress.

 

Ladies, I apologize for all of us. That men are genetically inferior is no

secret. Count your blessings that we die off at a far younger age, leaving

you the best part of your lives to appreciate the exquisite woman you've

become, without the distraction of some demanding old man clinging and

whining his way into your serenity,

Signed: Andy Rooney