Wheeler

Permission to Cry Alone in the wheel of light at the dining room table, surrounded by an otherwise darkened house, I sat in tears. Finally, I'd succeeded in getting both kids to bed. A relatively new single parent, I had to be both Mommy and Daddy to my two little children. I got them both washed, accompanied by shrieks of delight, crazy running around, laughing and throwing things. More or less calmed down, they lay in their beds as I gave each the prescribed five minutes of back rubs. Then I took up my guitar and began the nighttime ritual of folk songs, ending with "All the Pretty Little Horses," both kids' favorite. I sang it over and over, gradually reducing the tempo and the volume until they seemed fully engaged in sleep. A recently divorced man with full custody of his children, I was determined to give them as normal and stable a home life as possible. I put on a happy face for them. I kept their activities as close to how they had always been as I could. This nightly ritual was just as it had always been with the exception that their mother was now missing. There, I had done it again; another night successfully concluded. I had risen slowly, gingerly, trying to avoid making even the least sound which might start them up again, asking for more songs and more stories. I tiptoed out of their room, closed the door part way, and went downstairs. Sitting at the dining room table, I slumped in my chair, aware that this was the first time since I came home from work that I'd been able to just sit down. I had cooked and served and encouraged two little ones to eat. I had done the dishes while responding to their many requests for attention. I helped my oldest with her second grade homework and appreciated my youngest's drawings and oohed over his elaborate construction of Lego blocks. The bath, the stories, the back rubs, the singing and now, at long last, a brief moment for myself. The silence was a relief, for the moment. Then it all crowded in on me: the fatigue, the weight of the responsibility, the worry about bills I wasn't sure I could pay that month. The endless details of running a house. Only a short time before, I'd been married and had a partner to share these chores, these bills, these worries. And loneliness. I felt as though I were at the bottom of a great sea of loneliness. It all came together and I was at once lost, overwhelmed. Unexpected, convulsive sobs overtook me.I sat there, silently sobbing. Just then, a pair of little arms went around my middle and a little face peered up at me. I looked down into my five-year-old son's sympathetic face. I was embarrassed to be seen crying by my son. "I'm sorry, Ethan, I didn't know you were still awake. "I don't know why it is, but so many people apologize when they cry and I was no exception. "I didn't mean to cry. I'm sorry. I'm just a little sad tonight." "It's okay, Daddy. It's okay to cry, you're just a person." I can't express how happy he made me, this little boy, who in the wisdom of innocence, gave me permission to cry. He seemed to be saying that I didn't have to always be strong, that it was occasionally possible to allow myself to feel weak and let out my feelings. He crept into my lap and we hugged and talked for a while, and I took him back up to his bed and tucked him in. Somehow, it was possible for me to get to sleep that night, too. Thank you, my son.

You're so fortunate to have these pictures Lowlander! I have a few photos of my mother's parents but none of my father's... I've searched everywhere for relatives who might have pictures, but haven't had any luck, so far!!! I 'do' have some photographs of him when he was a child and I'm SO proud of them. I also have a picture that hung in our living room when I was small... many years ago. If you're just beginning genealogy, be careful, it's very addictive!!!

Oh no, Snowmom, I didn't make it up. It was written by Hilma Larken who is on a mailing list that I am on. She said that she wrote it about eight years ago. I liked it too... Love from...

I just had to share this one with all of you... A preacher goes to a nursing home to meet an elderly parishioner. As he is sitting there he notices this bowl of peanuts beside her bed and takes one. As they talk, he can't help himself and eats one after another. By the time they are through talking, the bowl is empty. He says, "Ma'am, I'm so sorry, but I seem to have eaten all of your peanuts." "That's okay," she says. "They would have just sat there. Without my teeth, all I can do is suck the chocolate off and put em back in the bowl."

NOW & THEN My dishes are piled up high in the sink The dust in my bedroom would drive you to drink. You can't see a thing through my windows, you'll find I found a small mouse living up in the blinds! My family eats meals that come out of a can. There's dust bunnies hiding inside every fan. Now, what is the reason for all of this mess? I have an addiction, I have to confess. I have a disease and there isn't a cure It's called "Genealogy" - what is the lure? It's finding the kin that I never have known Who knows? Maybe one of them ruled from a throne! I'm searching for ancestors, living and dead To get information, I'd stand on my head! I plod through old graveyards to look for my kin With all of these tombstones, where shall I begin? I go to the Archives and search every tome And get so involved I forget to go home. My family keeps wondering where I can be While I keep on looking for my family tree. But, don't try to cure me, I like the disease Don't try to reform me, it won't be a breeze. I'll keep on researching 'til I cease to be And then my descendants can research ME! ~Hilma Larken~

Georgia's old records have a new home By GARY HENDRICKS The Atlanta Journal-Constitution The new home of the Georgia Archives opens in Clayton County today, but about the only fanfare will be the click of somebody unlocking the door. Officials deemed it inappropriate to throw a party to celebrate when state services had to be cut and taxes raised to balance Georgia's $16 billion budget -- not yet signed by the governor -- during tough economic times. "I may put a ribbon across the front door and cut it with a pair of scissors, but that'll be about all the celebrating we'll do," said Archives Director David Carmicheal. The state spent $346,000 to move its archives from Capitol Avenue in Atlanta into the new $22 million building at the entrance of Clayton College & State University on Jonesboro Road in Morrow. The new four-story building will be 177,000 square feet, about 33,000 square feet bigger than the old building. "Having the State Archives in Morrow and adjacent to Clayton State's campus is a wonderful addition for the whole Southern Crescent that will provide an enriched learning resource," said Sharon E. Hoffman, provost and vice president for academic affairs at Clayton State. In addition to historic artifacts such as a rare signature of Button Gwinnett, one of Georgia's signers of the Declaration of Independence, the archives also house 10,000 state and county maps, 20,000 books and periodicals, 80,000 rolls of microfilm, 100,000 photographs and 1.5 million land grants and property maps. OPEN HOUSE The opening this week is for special tours, 11 a.m. and 1 p.m. daily through Saturday, at 5800 Jonesboro Road, Morrow. Information: 404-656-2393 and 678-364-3700. The National Archives and Records Administration, now housed in East Point, also will move onto the site, bounded by Morrow and Lake City. The $28.6 million facility is expected to open in summer 2004. The combined archives could draw nearly 60,000 visitors a year, officials have said. Moving the two facilities to the Southside of Atlanta is part of the planned multimillion-dollar Gateway Village Project in Lake City and Morrow. The two-archives complex will be the first of its kind in the nation, Morrow City Manager John Lampl said Monday. Another Gateway Village component is additional student housing for Clayton College & State University. Half of the housing is complete, and design work has started on another portion. A planned hotel/conference center across Jonesboro Road from the archives remains on the drawing board in the wake of the declining state economy. Putting the federal and state archives on the same campus appeals to researchers and genealogists, the primary users of archives. Hoffman said the state and national archives will complement the college's information technology emphasis and the history major offered to the school's students. Researchers said state officials made it as painless as possible during the past 10 weeks of the move. Timely notices kept them apprised of what records weren't available during the move. "Still, everybody will be happy to have them open," historian Michael Rose said. Rose is director of the James G. Kenan Research Center at the Atlanta History Center, which also recently opened its new records facility. -- Staff writer Peter Scott contributed to this article.

This is great! My oldest DS is dating a girl from Peru. She does speak our language but sometimes I would like to learn a little of hers. I've started on the colors... Mary

Me too MOMO... and I thought that I worked hard on my little two acres. Mary

Just curious Lowie, what are aubergines? Never heard of those...

Some of today's familiar words had different meanings during colonial times in the USA and earlier times in other parts of the world. The change in meaning often happened in words referring to social relationships. As examples: 1. "cousin" often meant niece or nephew 2. "Mrs." could show high social status, not marital status 3. "niece" and "nephew" spring from Latin words which meant "granddaughter" and 4. "grandson," so you may find them used in that context. 5. When we use the words "junior" and "senior," we normally think of a father and son relationship. However, in the past, these words were used more liberally and could refer to an uncle and nephew, or to two people with the same name who were unrelated. 6. "brother" and "sister" also were used in different ways. Members of the same church often referred to each other as brothers and sisters, and a married couple would refer to their brothers-in-law and sisters-in-law just as brothers and sisters. 7. "in-law" in the past could be either step relationships or the regular in-law relationship that we think of today.

Mammograms Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there's no need to worry. By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam, and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared. And you can do this right in your own home! Exercise 1: Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that position for five seconds (while you hold your breath). Repeat, in case the first time wasn't effective enough. Exercise 2: Visit your garage at 3 am when the temperature of the cement floor is just perfect. Take off your clothes and lie comfortably on the floor with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Turn over and repeat for the other breast. Exercise 3: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a stranger into the room. Press the bookends against one of your breasts. Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next week and do it again!! CONGRATULATIONS! Now you have nothing at all to worry about when you go for your Mammogram! And just a thought for all you women out there: MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause. Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men? And when we have real problems, it's HISterectomy! ... P.S. Don't forget the "GUY"necologist!

Hi Panzypatch, I know you're gonna love it here! I don't post very often but I lurk a lot! I live in the Piedmont section of South Carolina and I may be the oldest one around here... I'm 69 and a half!!! Just wanted to welcome you to the best site on the internet. Hope to see you around a lot... Mary

Mary

Hey y'all, We still have about 8 inches of the beautiful 'stuff' on the ground. The temperature dropped to 10° last night. I'm also keeping the wood stove filled and am keeping toasty warm!! My little dog, Chi-Chi, doesn't like the snow though... I wouldn't either if I was that small! Now they're saying that we might get some more on Sunday... Love from Mary

Now wonder why we didn't believe that???

Hey y'all, I think I'll join in too! I don't like to walk but know that I need to because of aches in the joints. My little doggie and I walked one mile yesterday... gonna start gently so I won't get too sore! I need to lose about 30 pounds and I am determined this time! Love, ------------------

Hey y'all, I kinda cheated a little while waiting for my copy of the Woodlanders to arrive. I went to www.google.com and found that there is a copy of the book online. So far I've read the first six chapters. This book is not the kind that I usually read... but, as I go along, I find that it is becoming really interesting. I don't recognize some of the terms used, but have begun to understand a little of what is being described. I believe that the book is for people with a higher education than what I have... but, I'm gonna hang in there and try to read all of it. It will be easier to read when I have the book in hand. Just my 2¢ worth! The book online is at http://www.mastertexts.com/Hardy_Thomas/The_Woodlanders/ Love from... ------------------

I just ordered it from Amazon.com for $5.68 and that includes shipping... I can hardly wait to read it... Mary ------------------

Hi Lowie, Just curious... How much would £1 be in American dollars? I love reading about things in England... Love from Mary ------------------

Naked shrimp Ginger??? Oh my!!! ------------------

Oh my!!! What a beautiful, touching story. Now you've got me sitting here with tears streaming down my face...and it feels so good! Thank you so much for that story! Mary ------------------

Can I join in? I sure need to lose some more weight! I go to aquacize classes three times a week, sometimes four and it sure has helped my joints. These sessions are offered by the University of South Carolina which has a branch in my hometown... NO!!! we don't exercize in a branch! Other than that I get very little exercize. If there's a YMCA or an indoor pool at a university in your area, and you can join, you'd be surprized at how much better you feel when you've spent an hour exercizing in warm water... Sorry this is so long... I just feel like I've come back home to stay... Love to you all... Mary ------------------

I just don't know what to say... this has been such a shock! My prayers are with Ed's family... Mary ------------------

Hey y'all, I'm waving from the great state of South Carolina!!! Mary ------------------

Well, Chi-Chi thinks his mama is smart!!! I won't tell him that I only got 7 answers right though. That's him sitting in front of my rocking chair... ------------------