I truly understand what you are going through... And my heart goes out to you and your as well as my prayers. The best advice i can give you is when you pray take time out to listen for the answear. And dear Happy, never hang your head if you fine you need to ask for help. Just think, if you knew of some one in your situation, would you help? How would you feel if a friend of yours need some help and didn't say anything to you? If it hadn't been for some of our friends around, to help us out, our bellies would of scared off any one close enought to hear... take care and don't worry about rambling on from the short time that I have been on Mrs. S that is what we are all here for to be here for one another. Hugs to you