Survival Song

[PureCajunSunshine]

This gem is floating around cyberspace. Many thanks going to the unknown person who wrote it.

 

Forgive me if this has already landed at Mrs. Survival. I looked and looked and couldn't find it here, so here 'tis!

 

 

A Woman's Survival Song

 

I’m not into fashion;

I like camouflage.

I got surveillance equipment

Stashed out in my garage.

I don’t wear many skirts;

I kinda like my jeans,

And they go so much better with

My bullets and my beans.

 

Now don’t be thinking that I’m crazy,

Not a sociopath, not even mean,

But if you come a knockin’

Keep your hands where they are seen...

 

I got a Smith & Wesson,

AK and Mossberg too,

One Colt, two Berettas,

A Kel-Tec... Hmmm, that one’s new.

 

I don’t know when the SWHTF,

But I’ll let you in on a secret,

Let you in on my plan...

I’ve got water, and I’ve got fish,

I’ve got ammo in my pockets

And a camera in my Dish.

 

I got flour, sugar, and my salt,

And if you don’t, that’s not my fault.

 

I’m replanting my lawn with berries and their thorns

All just to protect, all just to warn.

Maybe a few bushes, maybe a few vines,

And as far as you know, maybe a few mines...

 

The pantry is full of canned goods,

Closets are filled up too;

Everything’s been inventoried,

Even all my shoes.

 

Kerosene is for the lamp light,

And matches are a must.

No one knows what I have,

For there’s no one that I trust.

 

Chickens I will raise, maybe some rabbits on my land,

And a nice big garden, to help me feed the clan.

Seeds I’ve got - oh, ain’t it nice,

I got all that, and three kinds of rice.

 

I got flour, sugar, and my salt,

And if you don’t, that’s not my fault.

 

I don’t get the hurricanes,

No floods or earthquakes here,

Just lots of icy blizzard snow

And Mutant Zombie Deer.

 

I’m ready for a nuke blast,

Solar flares, or acid rain;

I’m ready for the Bird Flu

When the world gets quite insane.

 

I’ve done my preps,

Checked them double twice,

Not like in Jericho,

Cause folks won’t be that nice.

 

My BOB is packed...

Now what did I forget?

Oh yeah, the gennie’s full

And sitting on the deck.

 

When TEOTWAWKI is finally here,

I’ll be hunkered in my retreat,

family will be near,

 

And I got flour, sugar, and my salt,

And if you don’t, that’s your own darned fault!

 

 

 

 

[Vic303]

I like it! Almost sounds like me...

[HSmom]

I resemble parts of that (and aspire to the rest).

 

[ArmyOfFive4God]

Originally Posted By: HSmom

I resemble parts of that (and aspire to the rest).

[Jewlzm]

LOL you took my post Ao5.. I was gonna do that

[cookiejar]

I'm helping to pack that song...

LOL

 

 

[GoatLady]

Is this to a particular tune?

[Cat]

Sheesh, GL... we're women. And we know how to survive.

 

 

We'll just make up our OWN tune!!!