OldMaineBear Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Today’s “Here’s You Sign” Winner. The Perfect Diet Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena the wonder dog, at Wal-Mart and was about to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard. Wal*Mart won't let me shop there anymore!!! Link to comment
Jewlzm Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 LOL DH read that to me the other day. And I got to listen in while my FIL read it to my MIL! Definitely one for the books! Link to comment
Clovis Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Ive seen that one several times and still have to read it and laugh every time I see it. Link to comment
WormGuy Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 Thanks, I needed that. John Link to comment
OldMaineBear Posted January 17, 2008 Author Share Posted January 17, 2008 Yeah it's an oldie, but worth renewing now and then. Link to comment
mommato3boys Posted January 17, 2008 Share Posted January 17, 2008 It's been a long time since I hear that one it is still hilarious today. Link to comment
HSmom Posted January 18, 2008 Share Posted January 18, 2008 Oldie, but goodie here too! Link to comment
Abigail Posted January 28, 2008 Share Posted January 28, 2008 New to me...but a good one! Link to comment
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