cookiejar Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Creative Ways to Say Someone is Stupid -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About as sharp as a marble. A few clowns short of a circus. Not the brightest bulb on the Christmas Tree. A few fries short of a Happy Meal. I wish I had a blueprint for his brain; I'm trying to build an idiot. An experiment in Artificial Stupidity. He only has one oar in the water. A few beers short of a six-pack. Dumber than a box of hair. A few peas short of a casserole. Doesn't have all her cornflakes in one box. One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl. One taco short of a combination plate. A few feathers short of a whole duck. All foam, no beer. The cheese slid off her cracker. Body by Fisher, brains by Mattel. Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel. He fell out of the Stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. An intellect rivaled only by garden tools. As smart as bait. Chimney's clogged. Doesn't have all his dogs on one leash. Elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor. Forgot to pay her brain bill. Her sewing machine's out of thread. His antenna doesn't pick up all the channels. His belt doesn't go through all the loops. If she had another brain, it would be lonely. Missing a few buttons on his remote control. No grain in the silo. Proof that evolution CAN go in reverse. Receiver is off the hook. Several nuts short of a full pouch. Skylight leaks a little. Slinky's kinked. Surfing in Nebraska. Too much yardage between the goal posts. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer. The lights are on, but nobody's home. 24 cents short of a quarter. The wheel's spinning, but the hamster's dead. Link to comment
Vic303 Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Bright as a box of rocks. As smart as a sack of wet mice. His family tree doesn't have many branches. A few bricks shy of a full load. Link to comment
Amishway Homesteaders Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 had to read them all just to get to the bottom ones so I could find the one we always use: the lights on - but nobody home! Link to comment
mommato3boys Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 his elevator doesn't go all the way up his crayon box only has one color he's gene pool needs to be bleached Link to comment
preparing Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Not the sharpest tool in the shed. Link to comment
Lois Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 If he had another brain he could play solitare. Link to comment
Rita Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 LOL, my favorite used to be: "Somewhere, a village is missing it's idiot 'cuz you are right here!" Link to comment
WiccadStargazer Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.... Link to comment
zinger Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Wiccad...one of my favorites...I have it on a button prominently displayed on my purse. It's also my email signature. Link to comment
Joanna Posted August 20, 2007 Share Posted August 20, 2007 my great uncle used to say "Just an old bungalo" OR "The lights aren't on upstairs" (Bungalo=one story building) Link to comment
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