Midnightmom Posted January 15, 2023 Share Posted January 15, 2023 @Jeepers @Mt_Rider @kappydell I know there are others who will relate and enjoy this, but you three come to mind for a variety of reasons! Quote Today I was in a shoe store that sells only shoes, nothing else. A young girl with a tattoo and green hair walked over to me and asked, "What brings you in today, I looked at her and said, "I'm interested in buying a refrigerator." She didn't quite know how to respond, had that deer in the headlights look. I was thinking about old age and decided that old age is when you still have something on the ball, but you are just too tired to bounce it. When people see a cat's litter box they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat" I just say, "No, it's for company!" Employment application blanks always ask who is to be called in case of an emergency. I think you should write, "An ambulance." The older you get the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends. The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. Have you ever noticed: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL. The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he knows when he's really in trouble. Did you ever notice that when you put the 2 words "The" and "IRS" together it spells "Theirs" Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it. Some people try to turn back their "odometers." Not me. I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and a lot of the roads were not paved. Ah! Being young is beautiful but being old is comfortable. Lord, keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth. May you always have: Love to share, Cash to spare, Tires with air, And friends who care. 4 1 Quote Link to comment
Jeepers Posted January 15, 2023 Share Posted January 15, 2023 All true! I could hear the cartoon character Maxine in my head as I was reading them. 3 1 Quote Link to comment
Virginia Posted January 15, 2023 Share Posted January 15, 2023 How did you know so many of us so well? 1 2 Quote Link to comment
Littlesister Posted January 15, 2023 Share Posted January 15, 2023 Those are really good ones. Never heard the IRS one before. That is so true. Maxine does come to mind on those. 1 Quote Link to comment
Mt_Rider Posted January 16, 2023 Share Posted January 16, 2023 Thanks "Maxine" Midnight . Today I needed a bit of a smile. MtRider 1 Quote Link to comment
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