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I don't know.  Both of my parents were horrible, verbally & physically abusive, and my step dad literally threw me out of the house when I was 16. He ripped my door off the hinges, grabbed me up and tossed me out the front door--because I told him "act your age, not your IQ" at dinner.  It was a quote button on my jean jacket.  I had my car keys, but no shoes.  I'd saved up and bought that car outright from my job so it was mine.   I was exposed to alcohol, drugs, and was hit on by men when I was 13/14 because aunt would use me as a prop so she could go out.  'I'm taking Euph out, it will be fine.  What are we going to do with a tween?  I think I turned out pretty good.  

 

All parents should be good parents if they want to have kids, but when they grow up, the choices are firmly on them.   I've never excused an adult's behavior by saying 'oh but he had a rough childhood.'   I'll feel sorry for them, but each person chooses how they will live.  Goodness knows if I can be a good person, anyone can.  I'm crazy as a loon, but still a good person.  :sassing:

 

That being said, bad parents abound and what is considered bad parenting changes every 5 years.  Mine are so spaced that everything we did with 1 kid was wrong for the next one.  

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Sorry your childhood was messed up Euphrasyne. Mine was spent with a weekend step drunk who didn't like me any more than I liked him. Physical whippings too. He was in my life since before I can remember. Probably 4 years old. He didn't get to kick me out...I left when I was 16. I couldn't understand why my mother did nothing. As an adult I realized that she was afraid of him. So, after a long time, I was able to forgive her. But not forget. Yep, we have stories. 

 

I turned out okay too. I never turned to drugs or alcohol and never even took one puff from a cigarette. It just made me stronger and more self reliant I think. Lots of tragedies happened along the way but I think it just strenghtened my coping skills. I think that is missing from this generation.  They are soft and won't be able to handle the bad side of life. Or what they think is bad. Not all of course. But many. We just might be the lucky ones after all. We are truly survivors. 

 

And yes, you are crazy as a loon. We love that about you! So am I. :hi:

Takes one to know one.  :008Laughing:

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WE2 I am glad your eye surgery went really well.  And glad the fall wasn't bad. I can just see your hubby running in to get you up to take care of you. 

 

Euphrasyne, That is a horrible way to treat your children. But so many of them are abused. My mother told me she didn't care if I was 50 years old, I was never getting married or moving out of the house. I was 21 when I moved out and got married to my first husband. She would never accept my daughter as her grandchild and so never got to spend time with her because of how evil she became. Whenever we would visit her and my father she tried to make my daughter jealous of my younger cousins and raised he--with my father if he had anything to do with her. So never went back till my father passed away. Went to my father's funeral and never went to visit my mother till my divorce. Has no choice at the time. With no job, he took the money and moved in with his girlfriend. That was the biggest mistake of my life. But it all worked out in God's plan. My second DH was a wonderful man and loved my daughter as his own as well as the grandchildren. 

I don't know what has transpired with my DD as she has pushed all 3 children out of the house as each of them got older. Now, my DD is going to be a grandmother to a baby girl in Oct. They have already named the baby Josephine Rose. I like that name. They are going to call her Josie. I just hope DD does well with this child though they are in 2 different states now. So my daughter won't see a lot of this child. Might be a good thing.  But my prayer is she will do better than she has with her own kids. The grandchild having the baby is the favorite and the other 2 kids will tell you about it. I don't believe in favorites. Each child is different and all should be loved just the same no matter what. Just some need a little more working on like my GS. I really don't know what to do with him at this point other than he can't stay here any longer. 

 

 

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Congrats on the new baby Littlesister! I knew you were having a great-grand but I didn't know if it was a boy or girl yet. That is awesome news. I love the name Josie. 

 

Good luck with your grandson. That is a tough position to be in. He needs help but you can't do it for him. You did the best you could to help him and he only used you and instead of lifting himself up, he brought you down. Similar to what his sister and her husband were trying to do. Now it has to be up to him. When your health is being affected it's time to stop. This has to be hard for you I know but something has to be done.  :hug3:

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Jeepers, glad you are doing ok and it is only a cold.  

GS will be staying here for a while longer. Don't even ask about what the problem with his mother is. But she again took up for his not paying off his car and other things he was doing. So he just thinks it's all a joke. And laughs when I try to talk with him. But I could not give him the rent money I save up for him to drive to Colorado in that car to live on the street for one month with a guy he has never met and then going supposedly get apt. together. His car would not make it and no the police were really no help. But I can go to the magistrate's office and get something called CO something and then they can pick him up take him to the ER and then to a mental hospital. I think I need one of those for his mother.

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We are cleaning.  I have a sink full of simple green and water mixed 1:1 so I can get all the dirt off the tile.  I am taking a small break to cool down and check email.  

 

DD14 is going to see Hamilton tonight with her friends.  DH will drop them off and pick them up.  They are all sleeping here so I'll have a house full.  Apparently the twins have low life skills and called DD14 to ask what the white crystals were on ice cream. She told them about freezer burn.  Also, they have never had Chinese so we are having that for dinner.  It looks to be an eventful night.  

 

Last night DH and I went out to see the new Dungeons & Dragons Honor  among Thieves movie.  It was amazing.   There was a huge rolly-polly fat dragon in it.  We had a late dinner next door to the theater at Rajput Indian afterwards.  I learned that I pronounce my favorite dish wrong and now I can say it right!  Shahi  Paneer is pronounced with the ending sound he not hi so Shah-he.   

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Trying to get some dusting done and catching up on housework. The coughing has died down somewhat but not much sleep last night. GS of course is in bed instead of looking for a job. His days are numbered and he knows it. Next time he gets kicked out it will be for good. As for his mother, I don't know what to think when she just covers for his bad behavior. She was not bought up like that but I am starting to understand what my 2 granddaughters have been talking about. She won't take him back to live with her but she also won't condone his bad behavior. She covers for him. 

Might run out and pick up a pizza for dinner tonight.  I have lost 10 lbs from this illness. I needed to lose some weight but this is not the way to do it.

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Been chillaxin' most of the day. Drove by the house to see if there was any storm damage that we had from the weekend. Fortunately there was none. There is a woods right behind the house and I worry about trees coming down. Or roof shingles blowing off.

 

Yesterday I got 3 text messages concerning 1 prescription. They said to respond with a 1 if I wanted it. I did. Today they said they didn't understand my response. Turned out I was supposed to respond if I wanted my doctor to renew the script. It didn't say that. I had 4 scripts already there waiting for pick up. Two are vitamins. I'm going to cancel those as I can get them myself OTC. I swear I will never catch on to this electronic stuff. Next time I go to the doctor I'm going to tell him to only renew any of my prescriptions on the same day. It is too confusing for me to remember when to pick them all up. Especially since I'm now a half and hour away from my pharmacy. It's a little annoyance that many people would probably ignore but I already have enough of those little annoyances to think about. My annoyance bucket already runneth over. 

 

I discovered that a lot of my cross stitch work got water damaged or moldy. Bummer. Most of my patterns were from 1980-1990 and are discontinued. I had either donated or given the patterns away to friends and relatives. I never thought I ever want to do them all over again. Sigh. But after scouring the internet I found them again! The only problem is she doesn't take charge cards. The only other thing she takes, that I have, is Pay Pal. I have Pay Pal but I don't have enough money in the account. I made a transfer from my bank today but it can take up to a week to show up. And all of the patterns are 'only one left in stock' except for one of them. I sent her an email explaining my situation and asking her to hold them. I haven't heard back. She probably thinks I'm either a nut or a scammer. She would be half right. DIL said to send them to her house for safe keeping from porch pirates.

 

In the mean time, concerning the cross stitch patterns, I'm thinking about going to Amish country this week to check out their craft stores. It's a long shot but hey...it's Amish country. That is always a good day regardless.  

 

 

 

Update:

They take credit cards after all at the stitch shop. User error...again. Sigh.

 

Edited by Jeepers
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Jeepers I have picked up patterns of all sorts at yard sales at times that have never been opened. I have a lot of old ones for clothes and different things. I haven't seen many patterns at the second-hand stores in a long while but would like to go to Newport news as they have a lot of those second-hand stores to see what I can find. They also have Ollie's there and I would like to go there as well. Once I can get GS out of the house for good, I am going to map out a day trip to Newport News for some shopping at these stores plus JoAnn's fabric store. I haven't been to any of those stores since covid hit and I hope most of them are still open. 

Didn't get much done in the housework department today but tried to do a little. I just lose my energy and have to lie down for a while. Since when did strep ever take someone out like this before?  I am starting to think this is more than strep. But at least there is no more fever. Just need to find something that will work on this cough before it kills me.

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Well as per usual I screwed up the electronic stuff. The nice lady emailed me back and said they do take charge cards. You have to hit the 'shipping' button to see them. It sort of isn't my fault because she doesn't display that on the payment page. Anyway, I made my order and I'm as happy as a clam now. I never thought I'd find them. It's okay about the loss. I'm a little bit better at stitching than I was way back then.   All's well that ends well. 

 

Littlesister, these are cross stitch patterns and once they are gone...they are gone. I was lucky that this one lady had them all in one place. I plan to decorate my Indy house with them. The maker is by Told In A Garden.  I got the patterns with Amish and quilts in the design.  7 of them. :sEm_blush:

 

They were $15.00+ dollars on Amazon and they only had four of the ones I wanted. This lady had all of them and they averaged $8.00 each. One is used but that's fine with me as long as I can still read the pattern. 

 

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I think I'm getting better.  Rested today and was able to shower/wash-dry hair.  Neeeeded it!  Think I will get to be early tonite.  Slept will last nite.  Did not the night before.  Reading; talking to mom x2; Internet; .....low energy activities. 

 

I hope you get to feeling better, Little Sister!  Take It Easy!  :hug3: 

 

MtRider  :offtobed:  

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 I just hope to be well by Easter. I want to go to the Sunrise service and then have breakfast with the church family and then the regular service as well. DH and I always did that every Easter since DD never wanted to do anything for Easter after the last child was too old for an Easter basket. To her, it was just another day. Though I may pull out a small ham from the freezer. Got to have a good ham sandwich. I would like GS to go to church with me but it won't happen as you can't get him out of bed in the mornings. 

I used to do cross stitch many many years ago. I have been looking around at new hobbies to do after I get GS out of the house and finish getting the house back together. I might take that backup. It would be a good exercise for my hands. Keep my fingers moving hopefully. They do get stiff and sore. 

Glad you were able to get all your patterns Jeepers. It will keep you busy while you are waiting for your house to get finished and sold and keep your mind off of all the work that is taking place. 

My grandson vapes, smokes cigarettes, and smokes pot. None of it is allowed in my house. But the smell of the 3 is in his clothes and anywhere he sits it is in that as well. I should take stock of Lysol and odor-remover items like Febreze and such. I have to use it every day. Lysol since he first got sick and then when I got sick. I am washing everything in the house now and spraying. Will be opening up the house as soon as it warms up a bit more. supposed to get into the high 70s today. It is 54* now.  I am starting to wonder if that vape that has a very sticky residue could be what is making me sick. It may be from the odor gotten into my lungs and is what could be causing the very deep cough. I do know this boy as much as I love him and tried to do for him has got to go. He still says he is moving to CO to share an apt. with a friend, he encountered on the internet and they play games together on the internet. He supposedly is an EMT. I don't think he would make it there but I guess he will need to find that out on his own. But once he leaves my house it will be up to his parents and not shoved on me to get him back here to live with me again. I am fully out of it even if I need to sell this house and not say a word as to where I am moving to. Yes my DD does not like to be inconvenienced. That's too bad she had these kids, they are her and her DH's responsibility not mine. I am just the grandmother and that is how it will be. No more dumping on me. I learned this the hard way and it all happened shortly after DH passed and I have had to deal with this on my own. But it is all about to backfire on my DD and I am just going to walk away. 

I am really sorry for the rant but I think constant house cleaning behind GS's big messes, being sick for almost 3 weeks and everything coming down on me as it has is getting to me. But thanks everyone for listening to my scatterbrained mess as it is. 

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I have started opening up the house now. Still cool out but warm enough to open windows now. I walked around the yard and it has gotten away from me. Flowerbeds are a mess. And I still don't have the energy to get them cleaned out.  Walked around the yard and I am feeling it in every muscle in my body. I don't know what got hold of me with this illness but it is not good. I pray no one gets this mess. I think starting tomorrow I am going to force myself to start walking around the small block and work on getting my strength back. I did not realize how much strength I have been losing.  Sleeping off and on all day, not sleeping well at night because of a deep cough, and basically not doing anything other than reading when I felt like it, has zapped everything out of me. Don't know why I am getting a headache other than the breeze flowing through the windows across the house is causing that smell of the vape and stuff this kid smokes. I don't know how he even has a set of lungs. Going to put in another load of clothes and go sit out on the swings for awhile. I have to get out of the house and get some fresh air. 

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E. is here today to work on the (hopefully) chicken-deterrent cat door and to help me catch up on a week's worth of housekeeping and yardwork.  She cleans the critter poop, for example, and pre-washes the dishes.  After she leaves I will fill a sink with scalding clear water and a sink with scalding soapy water.  Things need a hot soapy dunk and a hot clear rinse, and maybe--maybe--a bit of a rub here or there.  I will spend far less than half the time and annoyance on them than I would if they were truly dirty, so I consider her service valuable.  She usually cooks, but today I have chicken marinating and plantains ready to cut.  I'll ask her to cut and cook the yuca because cutting them raw hurts my hands without a big, sharp knife.  (Guess what's on the list to get?)

This morning, we went to some hardware places and had to detour around a Palm Sunday procession.  It was led by a police car.  I counted sixteen across on the road the first time I counted them, and fifteen the second time.  I couldn't count how many rows there were because of the hill, but parades and processions normally have more than twice as many ranks as they do people in the first row, so call it thirty-two or so.  I'm approximating five hundred people in that procession, or roughly a tenth of the population of the valley.

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1 hour ago, Ambergris said:

I'll ask her to cut and cook the yuca because cutting them raw hurts my hands without a big, sharp knife. 

 

I have discovered a safe way for me to cut raw turnips, jicama, etc.  I put my knife on the hard vegatable and with hands out of the way, tap lightly with a small hammer.  It gradually goes into the vegetable and eventually down to the cutting board.  Slowly but safer, I think.  It does put little dents in the spine of the knife.  I love my knives.....but a knife is for using.  :shrug: 

 

MtRider  :pc_coffee:

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17 hours ago, Jeepers said:

It is too confusing for me to remember when to pick them all up. Especially since I'm now a half and hour away from my pharmacy. It's a little annoyance that many people would probably ignore but I already have enough of those little annoyances to think about. My annoyance bucket already runneth over. 

 

If you have a CVS Pharmacy near you it might be a good idea to sign up for the "Care Pass" option for $5+tax/month. You will get $10 "Extra Bucks" per month to spend however you want, plus you get 20% off all store brand items. (Plus, you can shop online and have your purchases mailed for free.)

 

BUT, the biggest advantage for you would be the option to AUTO-FILL your scripts and have them mailed to you FREE.

Just something to consider. :hug3:

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:sSig_thankyou: 

 

I will definitely keep that in mind for when I move. I just have too many irons in the fire right now to be making any more changes. Plus I'd have to do it all over again with new address and new doctor changes coming up when I get moved. 

 

Plus when I do get to Indy, my house is will be about 15 miles from town so delivery would really help. Nothing earth shattering but with the price of gas and my time, over the year, I'm sure it will be worth it. 

 

It seems like I remember my supplemental plan or my prescription plan mentioned something about preferring CVS. But I don't really remember now. 

 

I'm afraid I might loose my supplemental Plan F when I move out of state. It was discontinued for new registrants a month after I got on it. My agent said rules and regulations can change if you move from state to state. I hope it doesn't because I don't pay anything out of pocket now. No doctor copays and I've never had to pay for any hospitalizations or ambulance rides. I do know IN. and OH. don't have to pay tax on Social Security. I just worry about that Plan F.

 

   

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I am beginning to think we old folks are getting tired of too many changes.  I do have to pay taxes on Social Security. Welcome to VA born paying taxes, then taxed to death. Got the real estate assessor report. Looks like I may be paying 600 to maybe $800 more in real estate taxes this year. Then again in December. Seems for every dime I get my hands on taxes take it away. 

 

I told GS that since he is no longer working that he is going to get his tail out of bed and help me with yard work and I am not playing. So he pulled the stack of wood from the garage and restacked it behind the shed for next year's firestarters. Then I had him take those old yard chairs and table that had been sitting in the yard for a few years and never used for several years and put it on the street. Someone has already picked it all up. So at least someone might get a few more years out of it. It is only about 35 years old and has served its purpose well.  Been washing sheets, blankets, clothes, and everything on site and I am feeling the pain. If I bend down too long I get dizzy. I am sure that is coming from the illness. But that too will pass. 

I am going to keep GS so busy he will wish he got his butt out of bed and gone to work instead of laying around playing sick and getting fired. 

 

Jeepers I know you can't wait to have your house put back together, get it sold, and move on to Indy to spend time with your GS. Mine were a lot of fun at those young ages but I really don't know what happened to GS. Someone needs to knock some sense in that thick scull of his. He is ADHD but has gotten lazy since school. And really doesn't want to work but it is the only way he will get any money. Now he is going to learn what having his own apt. is like. 

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I agree Littlesister. I can't deal with too many more changes right now. I can't wait to get that house put back together and get it on the market. I don't know if I can sell it this year or not. It will depend on when they get it done and the time of year it gets gone. It probably wouldn't sell in the winter. I'll have to wait and see. The sooner the better for me. There are things I want to do in the house myself to get it on the market. Like some painting. I think there are only two small bedrooms and one dinning room that the contractor isn't responsible to paint. So I can do that just to add value if I have the time. Also the cement walls in the basement. None of it is a big deal and I'll probably be moved back in by then and will have the time.  A whole lot of probably, maybe and mights with that house. I already made up my mind that I'm not going to haggling with the price. If we are close then they can have it. I'm not going to nickel and dime them to death over it. I'm leaving a lot of guidance for me with a realtor. They know the market in my area a lot better than I do. They are interested in the highest price for their commission. I'm interested in getting it sold. 

 

So far G-son is a good kid. I was concerned about him being an only child with no cousins or little friends of his parents to play with. Socialization. But his mom and dad take him to a lot of activities and have him involved in a lot of things that he likes to do. He likes day camp in the summer, swimming lessons at the Y, cub scouts, some sort of exercise thingy and they are in a book club at the library. They have him volunteer at the Elks when it's appropriate. And they take him a lot of places. I do give them a lot of credit for that. His dad is a fair disciplinarian. Mom can be a softie so I'm glad son can do it. So far all it takes is a time out or a grounding to get him back on track. Grounding means staying in his room with no electronics and he is supposed to be in there cleaning that mess up. Usually 1 hour at a time 3 days in a row. They are big on him giving apologies too. Don't get me wrong. He is a little firecracker and all boy and can really get wound up. Unfortunately has his dads and my attitude and sense of humor. And a mind of his own. That little nut didn't fall far enough from the family tree. But so far so good BUT you never know when that switch can be flipped. You just never know. :pray:

 

The cross stitch lady sent an email saying the package has been sent with a tracking number. I think it comes from Utah. Since I'm having it sent to DIL's house I'm going to have to wait a little longer to get it. That is something small that I can work on here in the room. I still need floss and the canvass. Easy to get at Hobby Lobby, JoAnn or Michaels though. Will be nice to get a jump on some home decor on the other house. I hope I can get over there sometime around the third week of April. 

 

 

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Jeepers, I see a big difference in how your grandchild is very much involved with activities and both parents taking a role with that and doing things with him. That can very well make a big difference in how he grows up. 

With my grandchildren, the girls both played soccer but DH and I took them to most of the games. But the oldest girl really wasn't interested in soccer and would rather pick wildflowers on the soccer field.  The middle girl which is my DD's favorite got to do cheerleading which was a private group for the little league. She won the title and they had to go to other states a couple of times to compete. Then there is my Grandson. Daddy did nothing with him and mom just pushed him out of the way. It was always your best not to mess up my kitchen or something with these kids till the girls were afraid to eat in the kitchen for a while. Grandson was in Boy Scouts for only a few short months because mom was the one that had to take him because at that time dad worked. She didn't want to take him so she pulled him out. Not sports, no nothing. DH took him fishing every chance he got and taught him a lot about gardening as well as the girls. GS's babysitter was video games and I am not talking children's games but call of duty and worse. From a very young age, he played killer games or watched TV. This was an all-day event during the summer when he wasn't in school and also after school because his parents didn't want to deal with taking care of him or doing anything constructive with him. I think this is what switched him to the way he is now and not in a very constructive way. He no longer wants to go fishing even though I told him I would pull out the rods and we would head out to the river to fish. He's lost interest and you can't get him off the video games. Those games are part of the reason he got fired from his job that he wasn't so sick he couldn't go to work but because he wanted to stay home and play video games instead. I hope he learned that lesson.

 

I have washed sheets and blankets from both beds, clothes, and some work outside and I am tired. My coughing is starting to calm down a lot now. But losing 10 lbs in a week's time took it out of me muscle-wise. I don't want the weight back but I need to gain back the muscle and strength again. My whole body is sore and aking tonight. 

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Working on the house today but still very weak. GS is job hunting and putting in more applications.  I started working on the garage a little this morning and getting rid of more junk. I am just to a point I don't know what to do with it. So it is going out of here. Ether by putting on the street for pick up and what is still worth it will go to goodwill. Then if I do decide to sell out and move, I will already be ahead of the game. I am looking at houses more toward the country now. But VA taxes are so bad, I may have to rethink this and maybe look around at areas of NC or SC maybe. Taxes are much cheaper and you don't have to pay taxes on your cars every year.

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I couldn't believe how much more house you can get in NC for much cheaper than here in VA. My GD in CA said that my house as is in CA would sell for a million. It is hard to believe how much of a difference a house sells in one state compared to another state. And then there is the taxes. But then everything on the West Coast is crazy expensive.

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You have to check out the counties too. Taxes can be a lot lower in one county as compared to another. Over here the county just south of mine has a lot lower property tax rate and a little bit lower sales tax rate. My county supports Cleveland. Sigh. We didn't realize all of that when we moved here. The county line is only a couple of miles from my house. We would have just as easily bought there if we had known. If I remember (:rolleyes:) if I have a big ticket item to buy, I go down there to save on tax. 

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