ol'momma Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 Call me cold, but I am feeling an overwelming sence of relief. My father passed away this morning. He's been in the nursing home for hte passed... Gosh! 7+ years, and in poor health as long as I can remember. Right now I am trying to gather myself up to make the neccessary phone calls and break the news to loved ones. It seems rather surreal. Link to comment
MomM Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 (((ol'momma))) I am so sorry about your father. No, I do not consider you cold. You have to deal with the situation right now with a clear head and you know that he is no longer suffering. My prayers are with you and your family. Link to comment
Darlene Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 I agree with MomM...I know that when I'm dealing with a tragedy/crisis, I tend to shut down and get very focused on what needs to be handled. After I handle it, then I dissolve into tears. May your heart be filled with beautiful memories from the past to remember in the years ahead. ((((om)))) Link to comment
Stephanie Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 (((Ol'm))) The emotions will come later when you can afford them. Right now, you have to stay collected and calm to see to what needs to be seen to. It is not cold to feel relieved when a loved ones suffering has ended. As I mentioned elsewhere, I pray your heart and mind are full of precious memories. Link to comment
Mt_Rider Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 Oh wow....considering your thread about how to care for him in big crisis.... we all know your heart for him. Yes, it's a relief to see a suffering loved-one pass on to better. Despite missing them deeply. You don't worry about your relief. It's done with the best of your heart. Take care of yourself in these next days/weeks! MtRider Link to comment
CrabGrassAcres Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 When Mom died, it was a relief, though I miss her dreadfully. She had been sick for a long time and was in the nursing home in Texas and I was very ill and in Colorado. Oddly, the moment she passed, I was suddenly overcome with grief, though it was several hours before my sister was able to reach me an tell me she was gone. I know I will see her when my journey is over, but I still miss her. Link to comment
sassenach Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 Ol'momma, don't feel bad because you feel relief, because you know he no longer feels any pain now. It's natural, you know he is being tended to by the angels and they are healing his pain and renewing him right now. Yes, it helps right now, because you do have alot of things to arrange, to celebrate his life, with all the folks. My own mother was horribly ill the last year of her life, and although she tried to recover, she was ill with things that made her body deteriorate in terrible way, diseases that were horrible affected her and tore her to pieces inside, even though to the Christmas morning that she passed away, she was brave and courageous and fought to recover, but it was impossible and many of the procedures used were horrific in a sense, and I could only feel a sense of relief when she did pass away, and I got the Phone Call. Still, it was Christmas morning and it broke my dad's heart. CGA, my mother came to me on Christmas night. It was a Christmas that my son was able to come for a quiet visit and we were sitting here in the living room. Now, I am sensitive to certain things, I feel ghosts ( dont see 'em), feel them near me, and well, theres other stuff I know of, well... Mom came to me Christmas evening and surrounded me with this super warm pillar of energy, but it was filled with pure love and I could sense my grandparents, her parents with her. It was like a big hug from all of them, so I knew she was where she was supposed to be. It was an amount of love I could never feel when she hugged me with her earthly body, but also filled with an acceptance because only now could she know all the things I have done in my life, and choose to still care so much as a mother will..... and this was incredible in its acceptance, and the simple fact that she chose to come to me like this, in her passing. Then it was gone and I asked my son did he notice anything different just now..... he said no. It had only been meant for me, it's purpose, although I am sure she was glad he was visiting. ( And there were no drafts in my apartment). I didn't say anymore about it. Link to comment
snapshotmiki Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 I am sorry about your fathers passing. My prayers are with you and your family. Link to comment
Annarchy Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 ((((ol'momma)))) Sorry to hear about your loss. Praying for you and you family. Link to comment
Becca_Anne Posted July 26, 2009 Share Posted July 26, 2009 I am sorry for your loss OlMomma, but so glad your father is no longer suffering! Link to comment
homemaker101 Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Ol Momma, Please feel the hugs passed to you- there are a lot of things to do in the next few days but take time to take care of yourself too. You are not cold- just numb right now... Take your time to grieve and make sure to talk it out. May God Bless you and keep you..... Link to comment
Peg Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I'm sorry for your loss. Praying for peace and comfort for you and your family. Link to comment
WormGuy Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I'm sorry to hear of your loss. I pray that you and your family will find strength and comfort in this time of loss. John Link to comment
lunamother Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 you know I wish I were closer to ya'll right now- I'm a pretty good hand at getting things done. I understand your relief- and I interpret it not as being cold, but as being human, and happy that he's not hurting anymore. we love ya'll- you know that. ((((((((((O'Momma and Family)))))))))) Link to comment
mommato3boys Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Cold - never. A loving daughter that couldn't stand to see her father suffer - you betcha. I rejoice with you in his home-going and the fact that he is healed and no longer suffering. Link to comment
Snowmom Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I'm so sorry for your loss. I do understand how you feel, it is hard to have them go, but, so often, it is best for them and they do not have to suffer any longer. Link to comment
Vic303 Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 I too am sorry for the loss of your father. I also know exactly what you mean by 'relief', as my dad suffered severe dementia at the end. Link to comment
pinkroses Posted July 27, 2009 Share Posted July 27, 2009 Hugs to you; I know what you are going through as I lost my dad to cancer over like maybe 5 years ago now? Hugs sheila Link to comment
WiccadStargazer Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 Call me cold, but I am feeling an overwelming sence of relief. My father passed away this morning. He's been in the nursing home for hte passed... Gosh! 7+ years, and in poor health as long as I can remember. Right now I am trying to gather myself up to make the neccessary phone calls and break the news to loved ones. It seems rather surreal. ((((((Ol'MOMMA)))))) Link to comment
Buttercup Posted July 28, 2009 Share Posted July 28, 2009 (((OM))) I too agree with the fact that you aren't cold. By the time my mother's illness took her I was praying that God would take her.. And I felt extreme guilt over praying for her death, while at the same time was wishing for a cure.. I too felt that relief when she "finally passed". 9 years later I still feel grief.. Last year when my dh's father died after fighting one thing after another for 20 years, the only phrase I could come up with when asked how we were doing was we were "sadly relieved". We sat in a local cafe later making plans about funeral and this and that. I remembering thinking how emotionally drained we all seemed to be because there were no tears, no visable grief. So I will end this by saying "Bless your Heart" you dear woman. May you find peace in the comfort of knowing he is finally home in Glory! Link to comment
SueC Posted July 29, 2009 Share Posted July 29, 2009 I understand - the relief is greater than the grief, take heart and know that your Dad knows your love Sue Link to comment
JCK88 Posted July 29, 2009 Share Posted July 29, 2009 Oh...it's not "cold" hun. It's love. You will miss your dad but you wouldn't call him back to this life just for pain and suffering. Hugs...and prayers. Link to comment
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